The Ashen Actor *BxB*

Have You Ever...

The sky is grey, and the clouds are bursting with rain. I look out, the window fogged with hot breath, and the people running like ants. I turn my head away, this weather make me mad. In the land of lights, I feel dim. This place makes me feel empty, and like everybody else. I want to stand out. I joined the New York Acting Bureau for a reason. I want people to see me, love me even when they don't know me. I need to be known.

This is too much. Every thing could have been better if he was here.. but...

"Gabriel! The president will see you now." the beautiful secretary says, with a smile. I get up, and without a word, walk to the presidents office doors. I take a deep breath, and open the doors.

I take two steps in, and the office is grey, the office is made of all windows, and I look around, the furniture is all black, leather and wood. The domineering man in the huge desk crosses his wiry arms, his suit bulging. His hair was straight and black, with piercing wintergreen eyes.

"Gabriel Armoda, the actor." I smile, but on the inside, my nerves are going wild. His eyes are strange, they seem to look into the mind, and shred the soul.

"So, Gabriel, what will you be here for?" He leans forward, and threads his fingers, a cliche move on a directors part.

"I'm here to ask you if i can work for your company." He smiles, and leans back, he moved around quite a bit for someone who sits at a desk all day, maybe he was a runner or something, he did have quite an athletic build. Unlike mine.

"Good answer, Mr. Armoda. I'm happy to say that I will call the producers, and my other people, and authorize your entry into my company, Unity Producers."

"Wha- already? You haven't even seen if I can act!" He nods, and gets up, I stand with him, and he walks towards me.

"So prove it to me now. Act out something." He leans against the front of the big, dark desk, looking like a god of evil.

"Do you have anything to get me started? Maybe a piece from shakespeare, or Charles Dickenson?"

He gets a hard look in his eyes, replacing the teasing look that had show itself only a few moments ago, "An actor should read the situation, even if you know what is happening by reading it in the script, there will be time when the script will lead you wrong, and it will be on you to lead the way, until the curtains close at the end of the show."

I look down, embarrassed, i don't know about this... "So, Gabriel Armoda, What kind of piece do I want to see?" I look at him, he had a relaxed posture, leaning against the desk, but his eyes stared at me, an anxiety hidden behind the cool, expectant and sassy glaze. He was worried about my ability.

That's it! He doesn't care what piece I choose, as long a I act the part to his standards.

But that in itself will be a challenge. Now, what to choose...

Oh... I recall a story my mother had told me about when I still lived at home, being a full-time writer, she would often look to me for opinions, or relentless judgments, as a result, i became her confidant, as well as the person she would tell all her minute ideas to.

This was about seven brothers, all named after the seven deadly sins. The story focused on Envy, or in this story, Neid. German for envy. He wanted the things that hi brothers had, and the specific scene was Envy getting angry at Pride for boasting about his new coat. these brothers were trivial like gods.

I take a deep breath, and remember the story, lines, and deep, coarse emotions behind the cold exterior of Neid.

"Does a new coat really call for bragging, Stolz? (german for Pride A/N)"

I stand normal, but look up slightly, because envy was a short, but quick figure. While Stolz was tall, and regal. I move away, and act as if I am sitting in the bed of Neid. The desk made a perfect place for this. "why must he boast of such things, I hate it." The angry neid spoke softly. I had no idea what I was doing, and I didn't want to continue this for any longer, I could not stay in character with the director starring at me so hard.

I get off the desk, and say " I am sorry, but I realized that this tale may be boring from you, who knows nothing of the story."

He nods and says, " Gabriel, is your mother Kia Armoda, the author?"

Crap. I try to keep these things out of conversations, and so does my mother. We have a common need to be able to work in an unpressured environment, which Is why my mother took a pen name.

"Ahh... Yes... " I look away, but from the corner of my eye, I see him smile, and shake his head.

" Just like her, I suppose. To have a son very unknown, did she ever even do anything with you with a job like that?"

My mother worked very hard every day, and as a result, she taught me things that had given me great skill as an actor, and she took me everywhere, I had seen places from Germany to Africa and Japan.

" yes, in fact, I believe she was a better mother than most. I am want I am today because of her strong presence, and hardworking attitude, along with her skills as a writer, in fact, she has to be an actor as well, and slip into characters not in reality, but in words."

He nods, and says, " you are like her in more ways than that, you look almost like her twin, but with silver eyes, whilst hers are brown, you hair is even the same, as well as your voice. But... " he smiles at me, and gently takes my chin in his hand, " you have varied professions, and you both work at them with insane intensity. You are an amazing actor, using one of her cast aside works. Me and your mother are close, but I had only heard her mention you in passing. And, don't think she helped you get in your other offers bribes to no one, and I accept them from no one. I will not hire an inadequate actor."