Keep Strong

Full story

As I walked up to his grave, with his flowers, I found myself in deep thought. "You... left me alone." I said, as a tear snuck down my cheek. I was staring at the grave, "I remember it so clearly," I said, as the memories recorded in my mind played back to me. It all started the day I first knew something was off.
There was a loud bang that would have scared me to death, if I wasn't expecting it. I opened the door and to no surprise he was there, my best and only friend Michael. "Hey!" I said with a hint of excitement in my voice. "Come on in man!" I studied his face as he came in emotionless and silent, he looked pale and worried, then out of nowhere a bright smile shined across his face. I didn't bother asking because I knew he would tell me later. We were down in the basement playing video games and he still had not told me something was wrong, even though I knew. "Hey, do you think I can borrow some money?" He asked out of the blue "yeah sure, how much?" I replied curiously. "Thirty five bucks..." he said, as if he was broke "Whoa! Dude! Did you burn your money that fast?" I asked, wanting to get to the bottom of it. "Kind of, I got fired the other day." He said, defeated. I paused the game and looked at him. "Dude we need to..." I said, as he interrupted me "It's about time for me to head home" he stated, as he stared at his phone checking the time.
That night I was lying in bed, "what's up with him? He doesn't seem like his usual self." I thought to myself. "Well whatever, I'll find out tomorrow." I said out loud slowly drifting off in to a sleepy state.
The next day I woke up got dressed and walked to school. I remember walking because on the way I saw Michael and his girlfriend arguing. "I AM DONE! WE ARE FINISHED!" she screamed in his face then stormed off. I ran up to him, "hey man, is everything okay?" I asked. He wouldn't turn to face me, but I could tell he was crying "yeah..." he said with a sob and walked off but he stopped and mumbled something, at the time I couldn't make out what he said but now I am positive he said "I don't want to involve my only friend." Just thinking about where Michael's life was headed upset me. He was my only friend and I couldn't stand by and watch my friend suffer.
After school me and Michael were hanging out again we were sitting in the basement "hey we need to talk man, you haven't been yourself lately, what's wrong?" I said, demanding answers "I don't want to talk about it" he says, avoiding my face "Is it about your job, maybe what happened today with your girlfriend?" I asked, trying to force an answer out of him. He sighed, "That's part of it, it's also a hard time on me because my dad filed for a divorce on my mom, it just seems like my life is heading for the gutter more and more every day." He said sounding like his heart had just shattered and sunk. "It doesn't help that we get bullied almost every day too..." I thought to myself, "hang in there man, I know it doesn't seem like it but it will get better!" I said, trying to be encouraging. He replied "what would you know, you don't even understand how I feel, how could you possibly say that, easy for someone to say when they haven't been through it themselves." At the time I couldn't think of what to say. I thought he was right what did I know I haven't been through that much but it seemed like he was doing his best to get by. "I'll get us something to drink," I said trying to be comforting. "No need, I'm going home anyways." He snarled. "Oh alright..." I said softly and quietly.

That night was really eerie, something was wrong the air felt thin and negative, I was lying in bed in bed when there was a loud bang on the door, I was listening to the to my mom answering the door. "Oh....... Hello" she said with a long pause between words. "Hello ma'am, by any chance, is your son home?" a mysterious voice said, as my mom screamed my name from the top of her lungs, I ran down the stairs only to see a police officer standing at the door. "w-what's this about?" I asked, nervously, trying to think about anything illegal I've ever done. "Calm down you didn't do anything, it's about your friend Michael." What I heard next I didn't want to believe I couldn't see Michael doing it. I thought to myself that maybe if I knew it was a dream that I would wake up. I went crazy pinching myself, shaking my head, I screamed at my mom and the officer. "WAKE ME UP! Michael would never kill himself he is stronger than that!" The officer grabbed me and looked me in the eye as if he was trying to get to my soul, "I'm sorry but it's true, he was found hanging by the rope." The words hanging echoed thought my head piercing my head like a thousand knives.
I suddenly came back to reality, standing at his grave. "But, I will always and completely forgive you," I said, in a smooth soft tone, as I placed down the flowers and turned to walk away. As I walked away the only thing I could have thought to say was, "there are no answers in suicide, but there are many in life."