Primed for Sin//Basketball Diaries

5 - Fear

I could feel the fear rising in the pit of my stomach, taking over my actions as I stepped back into the chair behind me, the plastic scraping across the vinyl flooring.

"Calm it, Jim, I wanted her to visit me," Bobby butt in quickly as Jim stepped forward, placing himself around an inch in front of me, "Don't take it out on her,"

I found myself almost cowering in front of him, feeling intimidated by his tall figure. I looked between Bobby and Jim, "Take what out on me?"

Jim stared at me, his brow furrowing like usual as he studied my expression, most likely picking up on how scared I really was of him, but also thinking about how to answer my question.

I shared one last look with Bobby, sighing in defeat as Jim refused to give me closure with an answer before striding over to the door, grasping the doorknob and swinging open the door.

"Wait, don't go," I heard Bobby call out after me, causing me to jump and spin back around to face the two boys.

Both of them stared directly at me, Bobby holding a pleading look on his face whilst Jim appeared frustrated, his face flushing red with anger.

"Can I talk to you," Jim blurted out as he suddenly stood to his feet and began pushing me, "Outside," He muttered as he gritted his teeth.

Before I was able to reply, I was already out of the room and being pushed down the corridor to a storage room. Jim shoved me inside of the room, joining me and shutting the door behind himself, locking it. I was majorly claustrophobic, so that action made me fight him.

"What the hell are you doing?" I raised my voice at him, trying to push him aside to get to the door, but he resisted and pushed me back instead.

He brought one hand up to my mouth, preventing me from screaming or talking and the other up to my shoulder, shoving me against the cold brick wall. I tried to wriggle out of his tight grip, fighting him in any way I could, but he was stronger than me, that was clear.

He hovered over me, his rapid breaths hitting my face. His hand dug into my shoulder, making me squirm more than I already was.

"If you scream, you'll regret it," He whispered as he leaned his lips to my ear.

I simply nodded slowly as he dropped his hand from my mouth to my neck. His eyes once again grew dark as he eyed me, sending a chill down my spine. I pulled my face up, looking at the ceiling as I let his hand remain on my neck, feeling his eyes practically pierce my skin.

"What do you want?" I gritted my teeth as I asked the question, one I'd been pondering for days.

The dark room barely lit up his features, but I could tell that he was smiling, "You," He whispered, his lips brushing against my ear. I felt goosebumps flood the area he'd made contact with, the hairs on the back of my neck joining in.

I gulped, "You don't want a broken girl like me,"

"Except I do, you're different from the rest," Jim said, slowly pulling his hand down from my neck to my stomach, making me tense, "But I don't want you taking Bobby away from me,"

My breath hitched in my throat, "What?" I began, my features twisting into a confused look, "I'm not taking anyone away from you, Jim,"

He wrapped his hand tightly around my neck, pressing just enough to give me a warning, but not enough to actually strangle me and cut off air. I found myself remaining as still as possible, closing my eyes as he stared down at me, probably with satisfaction, or victory.

I'd never been put in this position before, having his breath hit the side of my neck and hand pressed against my core made my knees go weak, even though he could kill me at any moment.

"You scared of me?" He asked, a slight chuckle in his voice.

I didn't hesitate to answer. I was. I was scared of what he was capable of doing to me had I gave him the chance, I was scared of him in general. He seemed to be the short-fused type, littlest of things ticking him off and wouldn't think twice about beating someone.

"Yes," I answered, lowering my head as if I were ashamed of my fear of him.

"Good," He simply stated, "Let's keep it that way,"

He kept his hand on my neck, still pressing down as he stood directly in front of me, but releasing some pressure. He leaned his head to mine, his hair brushing against my own. His nose pressed against mine as his thumb leaned gently on my windpipe.

His lips were too close to my own, his hot breath hitting the soft skin. I stared at his lips as he stared at mine, the tension between us being almost unbearable, it's was like the heat between us was hotter than the sun.

"You scared?" Jim whispered, snapping me out of my trance.

I only nodded, not being able to speak at the moment. I couldn't help but keep staring at his lips, and he noticed right away. I think I just wanted to tease him or test him by seeing how far he'd push me.

He suddenly pushed me against the wall harder than before, almost knocking the wind out of me. I leaned my head to the side as he pushed his lips to my shoulder, pressing his hands down on my hips.

I let out a breath I didn't realise I was holding as his lips made contact with my skin, a tingling sensation rising up my neck as he pulled up higher until he was right below my ear. I felt myself slipping into the pleasure, letting slip a small moan before I felt what he was doing to me. I didn't exactly remember consenting to any of this, yet he still knew I was teetering on the edge of wanting it.

I wasn't entirely in the moment anyway, nor enjoying it as much as he seemed to be. He just wanted to keep me in line, keep me away from his friends, most likely use me, too. I wasn't ready to let any of that happen.

"Hey," I raised my voice suddenly at him, making him jump.

I grasped his shoulders tightly, shoving him hard away from me. He let out a grunt as his back collided with the door, his face being full of both lust and anger.

"I like a girl who can fight," He barked, the corner of his mouth lifting into a smirk, "Usually means they like it rough,"

"Stay away from me," I instructed the boy, shoving past him to reach for the doorknob, choosing to ignore the comment he'd made.

Before I was able to turn the key to unlock it, he grabbed me from behind. That was my one weakness in this type of situation: turning my back on my enemy. It gave them the advantage every time and it was simply a habit I wasn't able to break.

Jim wrapped one arm around my waist, resting his hand on my lower abdomen, while the other was wrapped around my neck.

"Really think it'd be that easy to let you go?" He asked me as I continued to fight the tight grip he had on me, again.

"No, but I know you won't hurt me," It was bold of me to say, but I had a gut feeling that I was right.

"Oh yeah? What makes you say that?"

I scoffed, "I make you nervous, that's why you lash out at me,"

I heard him gulp as he let me go, "You're good, I'll give you that," He began as he let slip a small smile, "But stay the hell away from Bobby,"

He muttered the last part, holding a finger to my face, "Why?" I questioned.

He huffed frustratedly, "He's my best friend, not yours," He muttered just loud enough for me to hear.

He spun on his heel, but before he was able to unlock the door and leave, I grabbed his bicep.

"Hey, I'm not stealing anyone from you, Jim," I began as I stared at his features, my eyes darting up to meet his eyes, "I don't want friends, don't worry I won't come back,"

I barged past the boy, unlocking then swiftly moving out of the small room before he could stop me, again.

I bolted down the long corridor, ignoring the nurses and doctors who shot me confused expressions, throwing myself through the main doors and booking it down the main street.