They say love is all about being happy. Expressing your feelings towards the person you love. Who said that?
What if that person is looking somewhere else? Someone else? Is this love? I am blankly standing here, like a fool. I remember the old times. It's like a dot that's disappearing.
Can't we try again and make things easier for us? I should've treated you better when I had you. But now, you're further away from me. Will it be better if I meet someone else too?
Rainy days like this remind me of you. Your warmth invading my system, chuckles that sound like music to my ears as I crack the jokes that you find funny. Instead, I'm here with nothing but coldness. How are you doing with this rainy season, Chaeng?
Even my dreams are painful. If you break down as much as me when I wake up, will you know? Will you feel how I feel? I hope not. Why is this so hard for me?
There's no hope, but I expect you to still love me. After a year, we would be living different lives. But I would still want you even after a decade. I'm repeating like a fool, you still fill my days.
I wish I never knew what love was. But you, you showed me love. The way your chubby cheeks rise when I come to you with food. The way you sing for me when I'm feeling down. The way your lips feel on mine. Love is something I wish was something as easy as everyone says. I'm trying to find someone new, but I can't help thinking about you.
I try not to think about the shadow that's called "you". You still haunt me, your scent is lingering everywhere I go. When I try to approach you, it's like a dream that's fading away. Where are you going?
"Come on, Chu. Try to move on. You're better off without her—"
"Thanks, Lis. I know you're worried about me," Jisoo looks at Lisa. Lisa's been there for her. Even before meeting Chaeyoung, she's been her best buddy. Having Chaeyoung's name in her mind reminds her of how painful it was on that night. That night when her heart felt the most painful sting it felt. "But please, I don't need anyone to tell me what I should do. Especially involving with... her."
Jisoo can't even say her name. The way it sounds coming out of her mouth when they aren't together anymore stings her heart. Lisa looks at her with those pitiful eyes. Jisoo looks away, hating how everyone thinks she's all broken about their break-up. And she hates it even more that everyone is right about her being all helpless about losing Chaeyoung.
Lisa just sighs, understanding what the poor girl must have been going through. "Of course, Chu. You do you, you're a big girl now. And I suppose you take a shower, you smell as bad as your socks after our practices." Lisa grimaces as her nose scrunches. Lisa knows Jisoo doesn't stink, but she said that to lighten up the mood. Jisoo's eyes widen as she smells herself. "I don't, you monkey!"
"I'm sure my nose isn't lying to me, now get up and get freshened up. I don't want to have my Jennie waiting for me just because you're here stuck in—"
"Okay, okay! I'm up, I'm up." Jisoo hurries out of her bed, avoiding the blonde's rants about her poor waking-up skills in bed. But she's thankful for Lisa's presence, she really helped her through these tough days. "Be quick. Jennie will literally skin us alive if we arrived late—"
"I can't take a shower in a minute, Lisa!"
"Make haste!"
"Okay yes, now leave me alone!"
Jisoo hears a door slammed shut and she sighs. Oh boy, another day again.
//
"I can't do it anymore, Jisoo. I'm sorry." Jisoo snaps her head at the cheerleader's voice. The way her name sounds in her mouth is so distant. Something is off, Jisoo can sense it. "Chaeng, it's late for your daily jokes. And also, try something funnier because that wasn't funny."
