Cameron x Nash Short Stories - cash -

Dear Friend Part One

A/n- this is a sad one, sorry.
Dear friend, what's on your mind? You don't laugh the way you used to, but I've noticed how you cry. Dear friend, I feel so helpless. I see you sit in silence as you face new pain each day. I feel there's nothing I can do. Dear friend, you are so precious.

Nash Grier; the strongest person I know. My best friend. My love. My everything.

He has always been the best part of my life. Since kindergarten Nash and I have been best friends. It's one of the clearest memories from my childhood. I was sitting by myself in the sandbox crying because a bully took my toy. Nash sits next to me with his clear blue eyes and his wide smile and shares his toys with me. He declared me his best friend and we've been inseparable since then.

I can't say exactly when I realized I was in love with him. But I do know that it was gradual. I've always been interested in both sexes, I have was brazen enough to have 2 dates, a boy and a girl, to my senior prom. But when Nash and I go away to college together I start noticing things about him the way I notice them about someone I'm interested in.

First it was the way his eyes light up whenever he's talking about something he's passionate about. Then it was the adorable way he can't talk without moving his hands. And eventually everything he does interests me and I find myself staring at him, lost in thought about how grateful I am to have him in my life.

Nash has never hinted at being interested in me so I now find myself at an impasse. I can't go back to just thinking about him as my best friend but I'm scared to move forward. The last thing I want to do is fuck up the relationship I have with the most important person in my life.

I'm sitting under a tree, staring off at the rolling hills of California. I have Nash on my mind as always, there are so many new things I want to experience with him. I want to know what it's like to kiss his plump lips, I want to know what it's like to cuddle close to him. I want to know what it's like to have him look at me lustfully, to have him want me. I want to know what it's like to have him not want to take his hands away from my skin.

I feel melancholy because I know Nash, he's not shy about communicating his wants and needs, he's direct. If he wanted me he would have made it known. I rest my head against the tree and I close my eyes, I let out a small sigh as I feel the warm breeze of summer over my skin. The wind rustles the tree and carries the sweet scent of strawberries over to me. There's a strawberry farm not too far from here and if the wind blows just right, I can smell them on campus.

I wonder if I should just be happy with being his best friend. It's not difficult right now, Nash is single and so most of his attention is on me. The last relationship he has, I hadn't noticed him as a potential lover so it wasn't difficult. But I rue the day when Nash shows up with a new girlfriend. How will I be able to survive seeing Nash do everything I want him to do to me with someone else.

We are almost at the end of our first year at college. Nash and I get a lot of attention, it's not too different from high school. But I don't pay any attention to them because my interest is solely on Nash. Nash claims he's too busy for a girlfriend, and I admit he is pretty busy between his classes and extracurriculars but he hasn't even been on a date with anyone.

I want to ask him but at the same time I don't because it would just cement the fact that he's not interested in me. I'm not okay with that, call me a pussy but I don't care. We'll always exist in the possibility, as long as I don't know for certain Nash doesn't look at me that way I can continue to dream that I have a chance.

"Wake up sleepy head," Nash nudges me with his foot and I open my eyes to meet the clear blue ones of my best friend.

"I wasn't sleeping," I tell him as I grab his hand and pull him down next to me.