Why Is Mid-Life Mooching Your Mojo? Solutions to Banish Fuzziness and Fatigue Forever!

Chapter One

THE FIRST PIECE OF THE PUZZLE:
You’re Not Lazy, Crazy or Finished

Michelle was a well-educated woman in her early 50s, and the mother of two college students. I knew right away that Michelle was a unique and special person, but her story was all too familiar. She was physically falling apart, having been to the Mayo Clinic, acupuncturists, chiropractors, naturopaths, MD’s, and faith healers – all to no avail.

One doctor told Michelle she might have fibromyalgia. Others said she suffered from depression and anxiety, and that taking an antidepressant  might help. She came to my office looking and feeling weary. Her skin was darkening, her hair thinning. She simply had no gas left in the tank.

“I have a good marriage,” Michelle said. “It seems like just yesterday I was full of life and energy. But I am terrified. It was all I could do to drag myself into your office today.” Michelle wiped at her big brown eyes. “Doctors can’t find anything wrong, and all of my blood work is normal. I really can’t point to anything causing my insomnia, depression, and weight gain. Yes, I have stress, but it’s not overwhelming. Simple tasks like getting dinner on the table are sometimes too much. The brain fog is unrelenting. I try to form sentences, but the words don’t come out.” Her hands trembled as she choked out her story. “I can’t remember why I walked into a room. I can’t remember my friends’ names. I’m falling apart.”

Michelle reported that whenever she talked about not feeling well her family changed the subject. Her poor health was beginning to strain her marriage. “I love my husband, but I have no libido. Intercourse is painful sometimes, and frankly I’m just not interested. I’m so tired all day, and my joints hurt. I know I’m too young to feel this way, but my friends and doctors chalk it all up to aging.”

Michelle’s confidence had been shattered by ongoing, unrelenting health problems, and her emotions were stretched to the breaking point. She felt like she was dying, but all her lab test results came back ‘normal,’ suggesting there was nothing medically wrong with her. Therefore, others concluded that she must be lazy, crazy, or finished. But Michelle, like the hundreds of women I talk to and work with across the country, is far from finished with her life. Yet because she could not be diagnosed with a disease or assigned an insurance code, doctors dismissed her complaints, or decided she was suffering from depression or anxiety.

We needed to get to the root of what was causing Michelle’s symptoms. By running blood tests to include a comprehensive metabolic panel, a complete thyroid panel (including T3, T4, T7), a CBC with differentials, plus thyroid antibodies (TPO and TBG), (I will share with you what all these tests mean later in the book) we learned that Michelle has Hashimoto’s disease, an autoimmune thyroid disease that affects more women than men, and is the most under-diagnosed autoimmune disease in the US. (I will talk about Hashimoto’s in more depth later in this book.) The tests revealed that she also has a “leaky gut,” which causes chronic inflammation in the body. Michelle followed a protocol I designed for her of science-based nutritional therapy, functional neurological treatments, and a gluten-free, dairy-free diet. Within six weeks the brain fog disappeared, her spirits lifted, and she felt sexual for the first time in years.

The experience for women suffering from undiagnosed midlife symptoms often goes like this in terms of how others respond: How dare you be so self-centered as to talk about your health needs. How dare you value yourself enough to keep trying to feel better. How dare you demand to feel good. In other words: Accept that you are an aging woman of fading beauty who has no energy, a lackluster sex life, and the inability to remember your own children’s names.

The saddest thing is how common Michelle’s story is. I have heard similar stories from many of my female clients around the country. Their health problems are chronic and insidious; their symptoms perplex doctors and frustrate family members, because these women generally ‘look’ okay. Hey, you’re not in a wheelchair, you’re not disfigured or bandaged up, you’re not laying mangled on a stretcher, so therefore you must be fine… quit complaining! And yet the reality is you’ve lost all joy in living, it’s a struggle to read an article and recall it two days later, it’s difficult to enjoy your children or grandchildren, and many of  the dreams you had for the future now seem impossible.