The Difference Between Fear and Terror

Untitled Part 22

Honestly, I’m not surprised that my house was sold. My father couldn’t care less whether I’m dead or alive. I can see his reasoning, but that doesn’t mean that is painless.

I don’t really know what I am feeling in this moment. There is the knowledge that my father probably realized I was gone, but didn’t care. He didn’t bother to look for me. My father left me with nothing. I don’t have a family.

I think I am finally starting to understand what it means to be broken. I tore apart my family. It was my fault. Everything is my fault. I couldn’t even stop myself from getting kidnapped. I am worthless, and my father just realized it.

I continue to sign the papers. I guess I’m living at Nathan’s for the time being. I hand them off to Dr. Roberts, who glances through them.

“You can take the bandages off when you get home; just keep the wounds clean to prevent infection. That’s the main thing, if there is anything else I’m sure Dr. Green will tell you.” I stand up to leave the room. “Th-thank you.” I am handed a bundle of clothes and they leave the room.

I put on the sweats and t-shirt. They are extremely loose, but I know they are mine. I have to roll the waistband of the pants to get them so they won’t fall down. Apparently not eating makes you lose weight.

I find Mr. Blackbourne waiting outside my door. “All of the others are at Nathan’s.” He holds out his hand for me to grab, but I don’t.  Hurt flashes across his face, but he blanks it quickly, withdrawing his hand.

We make it to Nathan’s house, my house, fairly quickly. He had attempted to draw me into conversation a couple of times, but I made it clear that I wasn’t keen on talking. I don’t think that will work for long.