Forgive Me

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"Pine Tree!" A voice Dipper knew all too well called into his sleeping head. He was trying so hard to keep his dream in a steady and peaceful state.

"Pine Tree, please!" The voice begged, asking to be let in. But the voice has never begged before and Dipper knew the voice was too proud to resort to begging as a method of trickery.

Dipper's hold faltered and the triangle quickly pushed in. The single eyed pyramid sank to the grassy ground of Dipper's vivid dream as soon as he popped his form in. The triangle did not look like he normally did. He was still a triangle, but his eye was squinted closed with small blobs of water sliding down his geometric shape from both corners.

Dipper stood in the middle of his dream, frozen and staring. He was terrified. Any second, Bill could just stop what he's doing and take over. He could torment and scar Dipper again. He could steal Dipper's body. He could start up Weirdmageddon.

Dipper was so utterly terrified that he was frozen. But Bill Cipher was crying in the bright green grass of Dipper's dream.

"O-oh thank you!" Bill cried out. "Thank you thank you thank you!" He grabbed the jade green grass with his tiny noodles fingers and gripped it tightly, like it was his life line and he'd float away without it.

"I've been alone for so long. Why didn't you come sooner? That was terrible! I'm stuck in this plane of existence but you never came back. I was stuck in that terrible stone body. I had no one to talk to and no way to talk to anyone. It was terrible Pine Tree! Just terrible!" The triangle continued to ramble, shaking as he did. Dipper could tell that being alone did not help Bill in the slightest. Or maybe it did. Dipper was still terrified but he could tell that Bill was different. Broken, maybe. But definitely changed in some way.

Dipper didn't know what to do, though. He was scared but maybe he could use this broken Bill to get over his own trauma. He highly doubted that and he was glad when someone started to shake his body awake.

>-<

"Dipper! Dipper! Ford and Stan are making pancakes!" Mabel's voice broke through and Dipper jolted up in his bed, out of his grassy dream.

"Pancakes?!" Dipper scrunched his eyebrows together. "When has Stan ever made pancakes and not burnt them?"

"I agree! But I think Ford figured it out and now they're making pancakes together for us! Come on!" Mabel has always been energetic and her optimism likely helped her overcome her trauma of this place. Dipper didn't have a lot of optimism. Mabel was excited to be there, though, so Dipper just smiled and got out of bed. She bolted out of the room to let him get dressed.

>'<

"Pine Tree?" There's that voice again. It sounded pitiful. Dipper had hoped it was just a dream.

"W-would you prefer Dipper?" That little voice stopped Dipper in his tracks. He had one pant leg on and was about to put on the other.

"Yes... Yes I would prefer that." Dipper answered aloud. He knew that little triangle could hear him.

He nervously put on the rest of his clothes and stumbled out his door and down the stairs. Everything was different even if it was the same. He just hadn't been there in years and he grew. He was about the size of his Gruncles now.

>"<

"Dipper look! They didn't burn them!" Mabel exclaimed, showing her plate of pancakes to Dipper as soon as he got onto the kitchen. With a surprised expression, Dipper sat at the table.

"That's really cool, Mabel." He answered her, actually impressed.

"Thank you Stan! Thank you Ford! These are great!" Mabel exclaimed, digging into her small stack of pancakes. She had enough manners to not speak with her mouth full, though.
Dipper tried some too and was now just surprised by how many surprises he was getting today. They were delicious.

"I'm glad you like them, kiddo." Stan happily said, resting a hand on Mabel's shoulder. Ford was watching from the kitchen.

"It took me a while to get him to stop burning the damn things over the years. Should've seen how many times Soos had to fix something." Ford said with a chuckle, grinning. That was another surprise to Dipper. His Gruncles actually being nice to each other. They were like actual siblings now. That playful banter but still obviously loving each other.

>:<

"Sixer changed a lot." Bill's quiet voice broke through Dipper's thoughts. Dipper drew his lips together tightly after he finished the bite of food in his mouth.

"You okay, Dipper?" Stan asked him, raising a brow at Dipper's expression.

"Yeah. I've just got a headache. These pancakes are good, though." Dipper offered, trying to change the subject.

"I'm glad you like them, Dipper. We were thinking about going around town today. Are you up for coming?" Ford asked him, giving a sad smile. He could tell that his nephew still needed time to adjust.

"I don't think so. Sorry Gruncle Ford." Dipper replied, rubbing his temple before going back to his last pancake.
The group just nodded in response with sad smiles.

"Don't speak in my head when there's others around. I don't want to mess up and have my brains poked out." Dipper growled in his head. He knew Bill could hear him.

>;<

It's been an hour since Ford, Stan, and Mabel left for the town. Dipper was laid strangely across the couch, his arms flopped either off the couch or over the back cushion.

"Why are you in my head again?" He said aloud. There was no one around so he didn't care.

"You're the only one that I know who would give me a second chance." Bill responded in Dipper's mind.

"A terrible idea, then. Do you remember how much grief you gave me?" Dipper grumbled, sighing and sliding off the couch more.

"Yes. And I realize that it was bad. But I'm in your head now, so you must be giving me a second chance." Bill responded quickly with a slight desperate tone.

"I can force you out whenever, remember? I became stronger. I'm not giving you a second chance." Dipper growled aloud.

"Y-you're not?" Bill's voice was so quiet now. Fear laced his small words.

"No! You ruined my life, Bill! I can't look at anything triangle shaped, yellow, or anything that has a singular eye anymore! I get terrible flashbacks that leave me crying in a ball on the floor!" Dipper had gotten off the couch and was pacing now.

"I'm damaged! I'll probably never have a normal life! I had beautiful thoughts for the future and you ruined it! You'd be surprised by how much is out there that can set me off!" Dipper was yelling now, waving his hands around while he ranted.

"I-I’m sorry..." Bill said quietly.

"No you're not! You're a tiny yellow liar that wants the world in his hands!" Dipper growled back.

"N-not anymore. I don't want it anymore. I just don't want to be alone. Please give me a chance!" Bill pleaded.

"No! Leave me alone, you fucking abomination!" Dipper cried out, kicking the leg of the couch. When no response came, he stomped back up to his room and pulled his own journal out of his suitcase. The book was filled with more angry scribbles and doodles then words but it worked for Dipper. He grabbed his pen, opened the journal to its next empty page, and started scribbling. Angry words and scribbles overtook the page, leaving it almost black. His anger left him as the page filled and Dipper sighed, closing the book. He put it and his pen to the side and just curled up on his bed. The angry outburst left him tired and numb. It wasn't long before his bright green field was taking his thoughts again.

"I'm sorry."

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