Butterflies (boyxboy)

Chapter 13: Too close

"It wasn't the ramen that made him leave...so what was it?"

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Back in St Ives, around 5 years ago...

"So, what did you wanna tell me?" Blake enquires, not taking his eyes off of the sunset as he gulps down the dregs of his first beer of the evening. The sea seemed so calm, so peaceful as it lapped on the shore of their deserted coastline. Maybe the serenity of the moment is why Hannah decided to drop her bombshell.

"I'm going to America."

"W...what? What?" Blake now looks at Hannah with confusion. This was complete news to him. "When?"

"After Christmas." She bites on her lower lip, looking down at her dress covering her knees. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I didn't know how to tell you."

"But it's just to visit right, you're coming back." Blake now is facing Hannah, trying to understand why his best friend is leaving so suddenly and why she never told him.

"I got in at Princeton. It's a four years, law degree...I may not come back." Hannah still hadn't managed to look Blake in the eyes.

"But...but I was gonna marry you! We were gonna take over your dad's restaurant."  Blake can't help it. He knew he and Hannah had never dated, never even kissed, but he had always hoped that one day, it would all work out. The stars would align and they would be together.

She now looks at Blake with a sad smile, a tear rolling down her face as she sees his sorrowful eyes. She reaches out a hand, gently brushing her thumb over his soft cheek. "I don't want to stay here. There's a world I want to explore. I don't want to settle down with anyone! I'm sorry Blake."

Blake pulls away from the touch, only to grab another bottle of beer. The air between them suddenly grows thick.

"I'm sorry." Hannah says once again, before deciding to get up to leave.

"Wait!" Blake holds out a hand, grabbing a hold of Hannah's wrist. She turned to look back at him, still sitting on the sand. "Please, stay. Have a drink with me... for old times sake." ...

***

Tamesh watches as Blake's words, which had been flowing freely, abruptly come to a halt. "I'm sorry, this was a bad idea." He clears his throat, getting up, ready to leave.

"No...wait!" Tamesh doesn't want Blake to leave like this, feeling partly responsible for getting him to talk about his past. He holds out his hand and grabs Blake's arm, the situation all too familiar to Blake, who pulls away.

"It's probably best if you don't do that." The model says, his eyes not looking at Tamesh as he leaves the table, with the artist being resigned to watching him go.

It isn't until the door clicks closed that Nam approaches the table, scooching into the seat where Blake had just been sitting. He proceeds to pick up the used chopsticks and slurp some noodles into his mouth. "Mmm..." he says before adding, "It wasn't the ramen which made him leave, so what was it?" He sets the chopsticks back down on the edge of the bowl before looking up at Tamesh, who had a very confused expression on his face.

"I over reached myself." He says, now turning his attention back to his noodles, eating them up with a slumped posture.

"What do you mean you over reached?" Nam questions. "Was that a date because Tam, you're worthy of anyone who wants to be with you!, even if they look like a god."

"No...no date..." Tamesh replies, it almost comes out as a sigh, as if he didn't fully register what Nam even said. "I don't even know him. What you saw just there was my stupid attempt at being a good listener, he was wanting to tell me something. I think it was something deep, but I seemed to have made things worse somehow."

Nam looks to the door where Blake had long gone. "I guess he's not quite ready to say whatever it is he wants to say, but Tam, you've known him for how long?" He looks back at Tamesh.

"Two days."

"T...two days!" Nam nearly upturns the near full ramen bowl. "And he's already wanting to confide in you? What happened in your studio?"

"Nothing unprofessional!" Tamesh insists. "He took his clothes off and I painted him."

Nam smiles with amusement. "I guess getting naked exposes more than your body. It exposes your soul."

"Yeah I guess. Though now I doubt I'll see him again." Tamesh begins to stab his chopstick into the bowl. He sighs heavily. "I don't even have his number."

***

Blake stops short of his apartment door. He can hear the faint sound of voices through the wood. He sighs at the realisation that Henry had people over. He just wanted some peace. He'd already let his guard down and said too much to Tamesh. What possessed him to even go there? The guy was just a stranger. A guy who paints pictures.

Blake leans on the handle opening the door to see Henry sitting laughing on the couch sitting next to..."honeybear?"

Both Henry and Dale turn their attention to Blake who is still standing in the doorway. They both look like they are portraying something different as they stare at Blake. Dale with the look of confusion at the pet name that he had heard, which he was sure Blake had called him at the shop the last time they'd met and Henry shooting daggers because... Dale does not know Henry calls him honeybear!" Well...he kind of does now.

"Sorry, did I interrupt something?" Blake asks, trying to sound genuine. He would usually be filled with little teasing digs at Henry at this point. A comment or jibe surrounding Henry's secret crush who was surprisingly now sat on his couch, but he couldn't really shift his thoughts from his deep and unexpected conversation.

"He's just come round to watch a movie!" Henry suddenly says as if to dispel any myth Blake may possibly say to stir the teasing pot. Dale just nods slightly, a weak smile present on his face.

"Ok.'' Blake says, his voice indifferent as he removes his shoes and jacket. He unzips his bag, pulling out the bathrobe he had borrowed. He drapes it over the back of the couch. "Thanks, I won't be needing this anymore." He then turns on his heels and heads to his room, letting the door click behind him.

Henry and Dale look at the closed door. Henry especially knew that something wasn't right. Blake had his moods, but they would usually result in outbursts. This was out of character.

"Is he alright?" Dale questions, recognising the concern on his friend's face.

Henry's eyes stay fixated on the closed door. "No I don't think he is, I've not seen that reaction before."

"Do you want me to go so you can talk to him?" Dale suggests. This causes Henry to focus his attention back onto his guest.

"No, stay. Maybe he needs the night. I'll speak to him in the morning." He smiles at Dale. It had taken Henry months to find the courage to ask Dale over. He didn't want anything to ruin this moment.

"Ok. As long as you're sure." Dale readjusts himself on his seat, reaching for the tv remote. He momentarily pauses. "I do have one question though?"

"What is it?"

"Who the hell is honeybear?"