Weak For Him || Darkness Book #1 ✔️

Chapter 101 | I'm Sorry

Stacey's Pov

"So what you going to wear for Liam tomorrow babe? You gonna look hot to drive him wild for being a bad boy" Sian teases and I laugh thinking about it.
"I have an outfit in mind. You know I love a bad boy, girl" I say and she laughs, nodding.
We order cocktails and a burger with fries when the waiter arrives and as soon as he leaves Sian starts to open up about Kai..
"I think he wants to move in together but I'm not sure I'm ready for that you know" she says and I give her a smile.
"I get it babe, if you're not ready, you're not ready. He needs to accept that or is there something holding you back?" I ask her and she sighs.
"I don't know, I think I love him" she tells me and I look at her wide eyed.
"What do you mean you think.. How does he make you feel?" I ask her and she smiles thinking of him clearly.
"Okay I love him. But how do I tell him. What if he doesn't love me?" she asks sadly and I shake my head.
"Aww babes, he loves you.. you're beautiful, smart and caring, he's lucky to have you" I tell her holding her hand and she smiles at me, blowing me a kiss.
"You're the best Stacey. I love you, girl" she says as our food and drinks arrive.

***

"We need to do this more often babe, or come round to mine and have a movie marathon when your next off work. We'll order and just chill" I tell her and she smiles at me happily.
"Sounds good, see you soon babe" she says and we go our separate ways.

***

Arriving back home, I walk into my kitchen and pour myself a rum thinking about my visit tomorrow with Liam.. but I'm a little nervous to see him. Why?
Maybe because I have a bad feeling about it.. like he's about to push me away again. I need to go there prepared for him to tell me them words. Not to break down in front of him and to just know it's because of where he is. He loves me. I know that. Obviously..
Taking out my outfit for tomorrow, I hang it over the mirror and take out my white heels too. I'm suddenly startled by my phone ringing and I search my purse for it frantically..
"Hey baby, how are you?" I ask him as I know it's him.
"Better now, are you still coming tomorrow?" he asks and I think weird he never speaks to me like this.
"Yes of course, why wouldn't I?" I ask him and he sighs.
"I was just checking in. I have to go now. I love you" he says and the line goes dead. What the fuck?
Fuming, I throw my phone at my pillow and walk into the kitchen grabbing the rum again. I need a distraction. How dare he put the phone down on me!
Walking back to the bedroom, I grab my notepad and pen sitting on my bed ready to write a letter.

Liam..
I don't understand why your driving me to drink lately but I don't like it. You're fucking pushing me away, I can feel it in my bones and it's not fucking happening Liam. You hearing me. I fucking love you with every fiber of my being and your breaking my heart more. I need you baby. I need you to help me be the best version of myself like you always have done when you're with me. Your loves special and makes me feel so fucking special I could burst. You can't do this to me again. Baby.. You can't break me. I won't let you because I will wait for you and I will be your wife. I'm forever yours Liam Johnson no matter what the future holds you'll be in my heart forever. Please don't leave me again..
Yours Always and Forever baby.
Stacey Johnson XxXx

Folding the letter up, I spay it and seal it in the envelope stamped to Liam's address. Sliding it in my purse to post tomorrow I want him to get it after the visit.. Whatever will happen, I'll be prepared for. I need to be strong.
Stripping out all my clothes, I walk to the bathroom and jump into the shower not caring to wait for the temperature. I can't believe he hung up on me.. Prick!
I scrub at my body and squirt shampoo into my hand and lather up my hair smelling the vanilla and honey. I massage my scalp and rinse it out repeating the same with the conditioner before grabbing my loofah and pouring my coconut wash on then running it all over my body feeling deliciously smooth I rinse and repeat.

***

Standing in my bedroom, I pull on a pair of short and a baggy t-shirt and turn the TV on, putting on another documentary to fall asleep to when my phone suddenly rings. Sighing, I grab it answering..
"I'm sorry baby" I hear Liam rhen he hangs up again. What? Why's he sorry?
I lay there staring at the TV wanting to know what the fuck he's sorry for and what's gonna happen now? Fuck. I wish I could go to him and talk to him.
"Shit, please be safe" I say looking up with my hands together. He has to be okay, he has a visit with me tomorrow. He wouldn't jeopardise seeing me surely. I lay down holding a picture of me and Liam to my chest and let a stray tears fall.
I love you so much baby, please don't do anything stupid. I beg you!