Will you be my nothing?

The Dress

Phoebe's POV:
Im lying down on my bed thinking. ' I'm stumped. Why would he want to know so much? I mean, we technically just met...and I'm sure he wasn't this persistent when he met his girlfriend. Well, gee...I sure hope not. Wow, look at yourself Phoebe, your talking to YOURSELF! This is getting bad...Geez...But seriously.
'Knock Knock' I looked towards the door and my mama walked in. "Hi Phoebe. Can I ask you something?" Uh Oh.... "Um...yes." As I looked into her eyes I could see a little bit of relief. She took a deep breath and I could tell, I was not gonna like this idea. "Well I know this is super soon and really short notice but, well my mother has planned a family reunion last minute. I know that you have just joined the family and everything is still new but, would you be okay with going with Jason and I to the reunion. You are a part of the family now." Wow. Okay. Uh. Damn. I have no idea what to do. I don't know if I'm ready to be around so many new people and all them attacking me with questions. Phoebe just tell her that. Huh...I never thought my inner voice would be...helpful? "Umm. Wow. I don't know. I don't know if I'm ready to be around so many new people and having them bombard me with so many questions. Im scared." Did you seriously just admit that your scared!? Are you stupid? Why am I even asking...OF COURSE YOUR STUPID! And there's the inner voice I know and absolutely hate. Yea! I'm back! Do you realize what you just did!? You just showed her your weak spot! She is gonna use it against you! You know it!!! "Phoebe sweetheart I understand. Don't worry. Um, I see you've been getting kinda close to Jason. You know you can trust him, right? He is a good boy." Yea. She's right. Jason and I have been getting along. Well, I just hope he truly is different. "Yea. Um, is Jason going to the reunion?" I guess if he goes I could stay close to him. I mean he is the only one here who understands what happened to me. "As far as I know Jason is still going. Why do you ask? " Mama told me. "Well, if Jason is going... than I can stay close to him." I don't wanna tell mama that he is the only one who actually understands my problem cause then she will be the one to bombard me with questions. "Yea! Great. Well, I can talk to Jason if you'd like." Mama told me with a smile. "Um, yea sure." The thing is I'm still not sure if I should be doing this. I just hate upsetting people. Its my one defect. I can be the saddest person alive, and I would still do my very best to make someone else happy. "Oh and Phoebe...thank you darling." She smiled and gave me a hug. I hugged back just not as tight. "No problem mama." When she let go I saw a shimmer in her eyes. Okay? That's weird. "Oh, Phoebe! Before I forget, do you have any dresses like formal? Or would you like for us to buy you one?" Shit..I don't have a single dress! "Um, I have never owned a fancy dress. But I don't want you to spend your money on me, please." She has a confused look on her face. "Phoebe, you are now my daughter, I would give you the world. Same goes for Jason." Wow. No one has ever said something like that to me. I..I still can't accept it. "Mom, please. Don't spend your hard earned money on a one night dress. I could just see what I have in my luggages." That's a lie. I know I have not a single dress in my luggages. FML. "Oh! I have the best idea!It would make me feel so happy! Phoebe could you please come with me?" Um, what is going through that head of hers. Should I be scared? "Sure." You can hear the uncertainty in voice. She got up, grabbed my hand and pulled me. I flinched the moment I felt that tug. I guess she didn't realize it. What is it with people not realizing things in this damn house!? My mama led me to what I assume is the basement. I stopped at the front of the door, frozen. "Phoebe darling, are you alright?" I couldn't move...it brings back all those memories.
*Flashback*
*screams* "Shut the fuck up!" My drunk as fuck dad yelled. He was pulling me by my hair and I was yelling. I had no idea where we were going but I knew I wasn't gonna like it. I was kicking and screaming just trying to run. All of a sudden, he slaps me. I can feel my cheek burning like hell and I stay silently sobbing while he pulls me somewhere. Finally, he let's go of my hair and throws me to the floor. He pulls some keys out of his pocket and opens the door in front of him. The basement. He throws the door open and a gust of cold air fills the room. He grabs my wrist and pulls me up. I'm weak on my legs and have to grab the wall for support. My dad whispers in my ear, " Go. Down. There. And. Strip. If your not done by the time I get down there, you will be punished. Understand? Good." That's all I heard and then he pushed me. He literally pushed me and I fell down the stairs and into my basement. That was the first night of many that he sexually touched me.
*End Of Flashback*
Just the thought makes me shiver. I can't go in there. "I... I can't." That's all I said before I ran. I couldn't go down there. Not ever. I don't care what she wanted or how happy it would make here...I...I can't go down there. I ran and ran until I reached my bedroom. I know she was following me and I could hear her yell after me but I couldn't stop running. I get to my room and close the door behind me. In the state of shock I am in I forgot to lock the door and she comes in. "Phoebe, Are you alright? ¿Did I do something?" She went to grab my hand and I flinched, this time she did notice. Finally. "I'm Fine." Is all I said in a shaky voice. I know she didn't believe me but I was hoping she would ask any further. "Okay. I'll be right back with the things I wanted to show you in the basement." I nodded a stiff nod and she left. I let go of a breath I didn't know I was holding back.
Just a few moments passed before she came back with two boxes in hand. "These..."she said placing the boxes on the ground "...used to belong to my daughter. You and her look about the same size. She used to love going to the formal family reunions, she would buy a new dress for each one." Wait. She has a daughter? Why is she talking in passed tense? All I did was look at her. I noticed that her eyes were glimmering and watery. "If I may ask, ¿Where is your daughter now?" She looked at me and I saw a flash of brokenness in her eyes but it left as quickly as it came. She cleared her throat before saying "Nina died from Brain Cancer 2years ago." As she said the word 'died' a tear slipped from her eye. She quickly wiped it away and plastered a fake smile on her face and said "But she is in a better place and she is happy, that is all that matters go me. Anyway, back to the dresses." She began to open boxes and took out a few beautiful dresses.

Out of all the dresses she took out, one in specific caught my eye. A beautiful floor length whine red dress. It was beautiful! I moved over and touched the dress."You should try it on." I looked over at her with a questioning look. All she did was nodd. Okay then. I moved into the bathroom and stripped off my clothes and began to put on the dress.

I finished zipping up the dress and looked in the mirror. The dress fit perfectly. It hugged my every curve, I don't even know I had curves like this, it also hugged my breast area without problem. I was in love with this dress. I actually felt pretty for once. I walked out of the bathroom to show mama and the moment she saw me her eyes watered in an instant.
"This is your daughter's dress, I shouldn't be wearing it. I'll take it off now." As I was turning to go take off the dress she said, "¡No! I'm sorry for getting emotional, its just that I haven't seen this dress on anyone in so long. It fits you perfectly, just like it fit Nina." She wiped a stray tear and stood up from her position on the floor. She sniffed and cleared her throat and said, "I think you should wear it. You look beautiful." All I could do was stare at her. '¿What the hell are you thinking. She is lying! You don't look beautiful. You and I both know you will always be a good for nothing, ugly piece of shit!' My subconscious is always right. At last I looked to my feet and said "Thank you but, I don't really have the beauty to pull of a dress like this. Maybe I shouldn't go." I went to turn and change but she called me "Phoebe! Wait!" I stopped but didn't turn around. "You are beautiful. Whoever tells you your anything less than beautiful is blind. ¿Do understand me?" By now she was in front of me. She handed me the dress and just turned and walked away. I looked at the gown in my hands and thought, 'Just make her happy Phoebe. Just for a night. Don't be the disappointment you know you are.' And with those words in mind, I went upstairs and got ready for the family reunion.