Love Without Love

one →

Stood by the curb, I waited quietly for someone to show themselves. You see, I was invited to a party just blocks away, and left as soon as they started singing. Because they were probably going to get really drunk, make me sing and end up getting arrested for disturbing the peace. Rubbing the bridge of my nose, I was sat on a bench next to the bus stop, which I wasn't too sure was for the bus or not. It didn't matter, because all I wanted to do was get out and do something by myself. While staring down at my muddy sneakers, I saw two lights glaring at me, in which I looked back up at, narrowing my eyes.

"Jesus." My voice was weak as two faces came into focus. Mark sat in the drivers seat, waving a hand toward the back. I assumed that was his way to tell me to get in, so I walked around the side, opening the door with ease and clearing my throat.
"Hey, thank you. You're a lifesaver." I sat in my regular seat, fastening my seat belt and glancing to the side. My eyes stared at the male in front of me to the right, my face glowing just because he was in my presence. His light hair was something I really liked, because it made him look so perfect.

Pink was a nice on him, I wanted to be able to run my fingers through his hair. My lips flickered into a smile, and I clenched my fist, letting out a sharp breath. Still heavy in my thoughts, I hadn't noticed there was a new face next to me. Turning to face him, I glanced over the stranger slowly.
"Hi...?"
His lips twitched a bit, as if he was going to say something to me. Then I noticed that he was fighting off a smile, and bowed his head in a quick nod.
"Hey." A short silence followed that, making me a bit uneasy. My eyes looked down at his hands, to his knuckles, tiny tattoos gracing them. I stared at his bare arms, noticing the ink staining his wrist and bicep. Then I looked over his face, his eyes looking at the front windshield. I hope.
I looked over his jawline, then to his dark eyes, finally looking at his lips. When he turned to look at me, I noticed the piercings on his ears. Raising a brow, the boy looked at me, probably wondering why I was staring.

"Name?" His voice was quiet, not at all like I expected it to be. For a moment, I forgot the name my parents gave me and the name I've lived with for seventeen years.
"Yujin." A smile fell back onto my lips as I saw him turn to face me in his seat, not able to move his legs so much, since the tall boy in front of him was greedy for room.
"Oh? I used to know a Yujin..." He mused, a tiny sign of a smile on his lips, though he didn't dare show it.

"It's pretty, i'm Jaebum. JB if you wish."
A sigh left my lips, I've never met a Jaebum. That's a start I guess.
---
The car ride was quiet, too quiet for me to feel comfortable in it. The only thing that kept me from fidgeting was the glances Mark shot me from the rear view mirror. My eyes caught his, and I saw his teeth point into a smile. I smiled down at my lap, holding my hands against my knee. Tucking a dark ringlet of hair behind my ear, looking up to see Mark had stopped the car and parked it in front of the house.

My head turned to look to my left where Jaebum was ready to open the door. He opened it and slid out, I closely followed behind him. The two in the front us joined them, as we walked up to their dorm.
"So are you rooming here too?" I ask as we walk up the cobble stone path I've walked so many times. Since Mark was my best friend I was almost always here, since my only other friend lives a city away.
"Yeah." He replied, pushing the door open and holding it open for me. Jaebum continued down the hall, and I stopped to hold the door for Mark, and Yugyeom. Mark grinned at me, patting my head and speaking.
"I'll order pizza and we can play games like usual hm? I'll ask Yugyeom to come too." He poked my cheek, making me blush and wave a hand at him.
"Don't be silly, just you and me. Don't make me forget you're there because you bring-"
Yugyeom walked past us, running his fingers through his cotton candy coloured hair and pushing it back from his face. In that moment I swear I couldn't breath, my heart stopped and I could recognize why I liked him.
---
"Yujin~" the older called out, eating his third slice of pizza as he sat around on the floor, looking up at me. I looked down to see him, since I was up on his bed looking at my phone.
"Huh?" The simple noise came out of me as I twirled around, wiping my fingers on a napkin.
"Don't huh me. I was going to tell you Yugyeom is going to the store, you should go with him." His voice was blocked halfway, as he raised a glass of coke to his lip and took a long sip, exhaling loudly after. I stared for a minute, wondering what good that would do. I was always there when Yugyeom went somewhere alone, but it never really did anything. Sure I got time alone with him, where I could hear his every word and watch his every movement.

The more time I spent alone with the boy I loved, the more miserable I became, because the only spark in my chest alive was of hope. Hope he would one day do more than hold my hand because I almost went the wrong way, or because he was leading me somewhere. I wanted him to hold my hand because he liked knowing I was there, I wanted to be able to reach out and touch him, just so I could feel he was there. A sad smile appeared on my lips, and I nodded slowly.

"I'll go, thanks Mark.. I'l be back, i'll get you something so you don't fall asleep before I come back." I grinned at him, hopping off the bed and rushing over to him, taking the cup from his hand and taking a quick sip. Bubbles invaded my mouth, and I quickly swallowed.

"See you soon."
And I left his room, quickly making my way to the front of the dorm, in which I nearly slipped headfirst into a wall. If it wasn't for Jaebum taking a hold of my arm and gently jerking me to the side, giving me time to balance myself.
"Whoops, thanks. Almost concussed myself." I heard him let out a breathless laugh, shaking his head as he turned away from me, letting go as he went to the front door. I watched quietly as he put on his shoes, tying them up with ease. I blinked about a dozen times, wondering where he was going at ten at night.

"Where are you goin' JB?" Taking a step toward him, I noticed he had now covered his arms, wearing a pull over hoodie. The only thing I could think about was that it was cold out and he would probably get sick without a jacket. He glanced up at me, both brows raised before he leant back against the nearest wall.
"I'm going to the store with Yugyeom, need anything?" I stood and stared.
To the store? With Yugyeom?
I wanted to hit myself for thinking no one in this house of seven people would go with him. Faking a soft smile, I scratched the back of my head gently, clearing, my throat.
"Put on a jacket.." I mumbled, wandering over and slipping on canvas sneakers.
"And, can I come?" Just as I said that, another male walked into sight, stretching lazily before he glanced over us.

"You're coming too, Yujin-ah?" Yugyeom's voice was quiet, like a weak breeze near the sea. I nearly melted hearing it, and could only nod to answer his question. Jaebum reached the coat closet, obviously listening to me and pulling a lightweight coat onto his shoulders and audibly sighing. My eyes didn't seem to move from the slightly taller, as I gazed over his soft features, my eyes slightly falling into Yugyeom's gaze. I wonder if he noticed how I looked at him, if he realized I was infatuated with his existence. Whenever I looked at him, I couldn't breath and I couldn't talk. I wonder if he noticed how I looked at him.

Jaebum noticed.

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a/n ; hello hello. v u v if you like this ff, be sure to let me know. I'll need feedback in order to continue. Comment please! Thank you for reading this far.
- snuggl3puff