Now I'm Just Numb

Chapter 3

Patrick's pov

I wake up in a sweat. My hearts racing, my eyes dart around the room- What happened? Where am I?!

A beeping sound on my right side quickens and a nurse bursts through the door, her face is worried.

"Mr Stump please, calm down," she smiles softly but it doesn't reach her eyes. I don't listen and my breath starts to shake.

"Where...am..I?" I croak and look at her. She puts her two hands on my shoulder which forces me to concentrate on her- Brown short bob, green eyes, faint smile wrinkles.

"Mr Stump, take a deep breath," I do. "Now you are in the hospital,"- I zone out, of course how could I forget.

My marriage.

"Are you OK?" She's asks softly and removes her hands. I just nod.

"Has any of my friends been here?" I ask hopefully, trying to distract myself. She smiles "Yes a Mr Pete, Joe and Andy were here until visiting hours forced them to leave. I'll ring them in the morning to tell them your awake."

"Awake, h-how long was I out?" I whisper. She brushes it off "A little over two days, I think your body needed the rest. But don't strain yourself, your still healing."

She says happily but firmly and leaves. I realise then, I'm alone.

What am I supposed to do?

Theres a clock on the wall showing its only two in the morning. Visiting hours'll probably be around nine.

How can I waste seven hours without thinking about 'it'. After a second of staring into space I feel a dull but constant pain in the base of my head.

I bring my hand to touch it and wince- both from the pain in my head and arm.

But my heads naked! Where's my hat?! Slowly I unpeel the wires off myself and when no sirens sound I jump off the bed to only fall over.

Damn I've gotten weak. I shakely pick myself up using the bed frame to help. I lean over, open the dorr and crawl out.

OK Patrick you can do this, one foot at a time. I make it half way down the hall before I hear footsteps.

I limp down the corridor which leads in the opposite direction. The cool floor feels quite nice on my bare feet.

Where am I going?? I keep wandering. Until I glance at a patients name on the outside of a closed door- Elisa Yao.

My legs almost give way- thank everyone for walls! My stomach goes dry, should I try to talk to her? Maybe the note was just a misunderstanding.

Yeah of course why else would the love of your life leave you for no reason?

A feeling of dread grows in my stomach as I place my hand on the doorknob. My body freezes.

Come on, you can do this. I turn it and walk into the dark room. My hand finds the light switch and I'm lost for words.

The rooms empty! No Elisa, gone!

I look at the paper on the wall which says she was discharged. I sit in a dze on her bed but what tips me over is seeing my fedora on her pillow.

So she saw me before leaving. Is it really for good? Thoughts flood my brain making the pain grow.

So much for fixing things I smurk until I feel distant. Slowly my body unconsciously curls up onto the bed.

I hold the fedora and try to keep my breathing in order. It won't slow down.

Whether its lack of sleep or 'shock' eye lids close and I fall asleep.