Do you know?

Family is everything?

Hello,
I'm going to name myself as Ren and this is one of the first stories I will write. This story is about the my family. Being the oldest siblings I was kinda the evil stepmother to my younger siblings.

I will tell you my experiences as a girl in a huge family. First of all there is lots of love. When you want to do something they always tell you their opinions whether they agree or disagree.

I don't want a Quinceanera but as a young child I was pressured into wanting one because it was something you needed to do. When I was younger I didn't want one because of a family of  like 8, so it was a lot of money.

I thought I was helping my parents by not asking for things. When they asked me for things I want I'd say "it's okay I don't need anything" or "mom it's fine, but for my siblings so they have something". For some reason my mom would get angry for not getting anything. I thought why, I'm saving you money and I didn't really want anything. But, maybe I was being selfish in a way. We didn't have lots of money the throw around. As a child I used white paint and food due to make my own colored paint because I didn't want to be a burden to them. I thought I was a of money. Money is the reason I thought that was the problem. It's the reason that people fight over and get hurt by.

I'm I really a person who deserves this much. Now I have lots of paint supplies and brushes. I also draw, tried glass paintings, paint on paper, and do water color.  Do I deserve such a mother that cares about me so much that she buy me so much stuff. But, she doesn't always agree with me. In my heart I know she loves me so much she doesn't want me to suffer but it to late for me.

My parents suffer a lot because they were so much more poor than we are now but I lucky to have the things I have. My dad have to work and work since he was like five maybe younger to help all that he can. He helped and helped because he was also the oldest of so many. He even said once when he was younger when he had one of those yogurt drink he didn't get the enjoy as much as he could have because he shared it with all his siblings when he could have been selfish. He played with bricks because they didn't have toy cars or anything. He made it work.

As for my mom she had it easier than my dad. She moved to America when she was like 11 and her mom met her step father and they had kids. She grew up knowing that she wouldn't fit in as much since she can only speak Spanish. She cooked and clean she was also the oldest.

My mom is a huge part of my life. But, she can be so mean and out of control since she so stressed and filled with anxiety. I get that but I also know how it feels it something that runs with me.