his star

𝐗𝐗𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈

𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐨

𝚍𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝟸𝟶𝚝𝚑, 𝟷𝟿𝟿𝟼

My head is spinning, stomach is contracting and my throat is closed, giving me the feeling that I can't breathe.

My feet touch the cobblestone although I'm worried that the solid ground gets pulled away, causing me to fall into endless nothingness.

Hands fly towards my mouth, trying to keep it shut until I run towards the nearest pair of bushes to vomit. I still can't see anything, first of all because I feel lightheaded and second of all because of the tears that made my eyesight blurry.

Footsteps come closer to me, heels tapping on the stony floor and noises growing louder and louder by the second.

I quickly wipe my mouth clean, feeling gross for doing it with the sleeve of my suit, but I'll just wash it later. Whatever I'm doing right now and whatever will happen these next days will be bad, really bad and the vomit on the black material will be the thing I couldn't care less about.

A slight and careful touch is the reason why I let my head fall for a short second until I straighten myself again, standing up and finding my balance before I turn around to face the person who kept me company.

"Hello, mother."

I don't receive an answer, don't see her mouth fall open in order to speak to me. I just get pulled into a tight hug, giving me the impression that she is holding the world together by pressing me against her and never letting me go.

She is moving her fingers through my hair like she used to do when she brought me to bed and waited until I fell asleep. She smells the same like she always does, still the same perfume I used to steal from her before I went to my first year at Hogwarts. I'm not sure if she knows that, but I took it from her in order to spray it on one of my pillows. It's ridiculous, I know, but it made me feel safe and that safety is filling me up again with every time I inhale her scent.

She has positioned her toes on top of mine because it's one of her rituals I've never seen anyone else do besides her. It's a bit weird, I have to admit that, but at the same time I wouldn't want to miss it. Mother always does it when she pulls me into a hug because that way she avoids the possibility that I walk away from her, decline her offer of showing me love or whatever else she wants to give me. She doesn't really step on my feet, doesn't shift her whole bodyweight on my toes, so I don't really feel it that much and it doesn't hurt. It's just her way of keeping me close until she is ready to let go again.

"Don't cry, mother. It's okay, please don't cry." I whisper into her ear, slightly placing my hands on both sides of her face to remove her from me, giving me access to wipe away the salty drops of water that are on their way to explore the length of her face, dampening her skin.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." she replaces her sad expression with a happy one, placing her hand on top of mine and stepping away from me a bit, lifting her feet from on top of mine. "I'm just glad that you are here."

I want to say the same, want to be happy about visiting my home again, but even though mother is here I can't be happy.

"Come on, let's go inside." she sends me a smile, already on her way to walk towards our Manor, but I tense up, not following after her.

"It's all right, Draco, they aren't here." my eyes fall shut, exhaling for a long time until I take in the sight of her again, finally being able to walk.

As soon as I step through our door, a breeze of coldness rushes all over my body, causing me to freeze even more although it probably is colder outside.