I bounce Ezekiel in my lap. He gurgles happily and touches my face. Rose smiles at me. I ignore her and I kiss his forehead, remembering my old son. He was only four years when he died. My two daughters. One 15 and looked like her mother, the other 20 and looked like me. My son who just arrived the day before. My eyes and hair, mother's features. My four year old looked exactly like me except his moms blue eyes.
I didn't notice I was crying until Rose snapped me out of it. I wipe my tears with one hand. "Sorry." I get up with Ezekiel and go in my room. I lock the door and I sit with him. He's a calm baby and he listens. "I remember, long ago- I had four kids. Two girls and two boys. My daughters were 15 and 20. My boys were 4 years and a day old. You look just like my day old son. He was born and I thought that I was going to live happily. Travel with my family." Ezekiel gurgles in response.
I smile softly, tears brim in my eyes. "And then these aliens, my enemies, the Daleks. They came onto my planet- Gallifrey and started what is called the Time War. I ran with my family wanting to protect them. One Dalek- he had a name. Dalek Caan. He exterminated my fifteen year old daughter, who was right behind me. My friends, Sarah Jane Smith and Captain Jack Harkness. They blew the Dalek up."
Ezekiel shows a soft, comforting expression. "I went back and of course, got my fallen daughter. She refused to regenerate. She could've lived, I could've carried her. She still refused. 'Ellie,' I told her. 'I can carry you.' But she refused. She died and I refused to let her go." I start to choke on my words. Ezekiel strokes my cheek. "My other daughter decided we can secretly bury her. So we did. Then we were off again. Next to go down was my boy. My four year old. He regenerated and I carried the poor kid in my arms, as he healed from the pain. We were running for weeks. My son healed and I set him down. Then my other boy got hungry. We were feeding him, cooing soft words."
I close my eyes. "Well, here came the Dalek. My Daughter noticed and threw herself in front of her mother. Kind girl. She fell. Regenerated. She was too much to carry. So we stayed put. Since Jack had stayed with us, He killed that Dalek. We were all reviving her back to health. When she healed, off we were. My four year old started to whimper that his legs hurt. 'Come on, Zeke' I had encouraged him. 'You can make it' He sobbed and my wife scolded me. 'Can't you carry him?' she had snapped. 'Oi! I am carrying are son' I replied. She was carrying our necessities. My daughter just grabbed him and off we ran."
I wipe my cheek, opening my eyes. "Next down was her. My beautiful daughter. She had a boyfriend and was four months pregnant. She couldn't stand it and she died. The baby survived so Jack took the little guy. We were trying to find a TARDIS to run and hide. Next my wife went down. As stubborn as the others, she died. Now Zeke took the baby and Jack carried the necessities and I had my son. Just us guys. We were fine for a good month, then down went my four year old. He didn't want to go through regeneration again."
I bite my lip hard. "I had enough of this. My family was dying. I start to scream at the Dalek to kill me and leave my family alone. Jack killed it before it had a chance. 'Doctor' he had said softly. 'You still have a son and nephew. Don't be hasty' so I stopped having tantrums at the Daleks. Jack took my son and I carried our needs and my nephew. My son. Dead. Jack turned slightly to talk to me and they got his foot. Too young to know how to regenerate. Dead. I still had my nephew. Jack guarded me and my nephew. That poor baby. Two years. He insisted to run so I held his hand, running. Jack was protecting us but two Daleks came."
I let out a sob and Ezekiel lays down on my chest. "Shot the second one too late. I don't blame him at all. So off me and Jack were. I went through one regeneration during that war. We found a TARDIS, entered it and escaped. We both came to Earth." I stroke Ezekiel's back. "It was a horrible time. My family. Friends. All died. I was the last one." I hear soft sob. "Rose..." I whisper loudly, not too loud. "Doctor." She replies and I set Ezekiel down, opening the door.
Rose hugged me and I buried my face in her neck. "Gallifrey was destroyed." I whisper and she strokes my cheek. "I know, Doctor. You are so brave, going through that much." She whispers. "Doctor?" I look at her. "Would it be better if we call him Zeke?" She asks, looking at Ezekiel. "If that's okay with you." I say softly. "Of course." She kisses me softly and I kiss her back. Glad to have her. "I love you." She whispers in Gallifreyan. "This family will raise Gallifrey back up. Show those Daleks." I was taken aback at her fluent Gallifreyan. "I love you, too. But we can't create a planet." I reply staying in my natural language. "We'll see about that, Doctor." She whispers back. She must've really studied my language.
And I love her for it.
