July 17,2021
11:21PM
Orlando,FL
I woke up in a decent mood today. Went to work today, and it was pretty good. Not too hot, which I was so happy for. Not gonna drag this journal out so Ill come back tomorrow.
July 22,2021
11:39PM
Orlando,FL
I feel absolutely tried and embarrassed. I know not to believe he say she say, but when it comes with actual screenshots and proof? Then I have no choice to believe it. Mind you I went out of town to see this guy I was dating, plus my bestfriend. Months later, I find out what was the truth and what was the lie. Was I dumb for allowing him to do what he did while I was out of town? Yes, but I realize that now, and wont make that same mistake again. But my thing is... why do niggas have someone they know loves them, and would do anything for them, AND HAS. But takes advantage of em and do shit behind their back? Truth always comes out to the light people, what you try to hide cant be hidden for long... and thats just how I feel. I really feel myself changing for the worst and I dont like it. I keep getting my feelings fucked over continuously and Im at a point where Im just over it. I refuse to do people how they do me, but at this point it seems like the only way for people to not take me for granted. Im in a fuck everybody mood and pissed, angry, its just a build up. I try to put my feelings to the side and not react, but I'm so close to exploding. Im tired for blaming myself for why shit dont work out, between me or anybody. I now realize shit isnt always one hundred percent my fault and not to beat myself over it. And Ill conclude this journal with that, goodnight and I hope I wake up in a better mood.
SJR🤍
