Clementine The Queer

Part One - Corn Dogs

This was it. One of the biggest days of my life. Sorry, I'm totally overreacting! It's not the most important day EVER, but personally, I'm still fucking terrified. Oh yes, today is the day that I tell my crush, Florencia, I like her.

I don't want to sound like I'm in some typical fairytale where everyone lives happily ever after, or the frog turns into a beautiful princess, but I've always dreamed of telling her that I love her in a meadow surrounded by trees and flowers, and small red toadstools peeking out through lush grass, that's bright red colour match that of her hair. Maybe we'd even have a picnic with candles or possibly a flickering lantern. Believe me, all of those sleepless nights when I would imagine what it would be like when I told her my feelings, and then she would obviously admit to feeling the same way about me, and we would share a kiss that would make Disney princesses swoon with jealousy. But then I would have to wake up the next day and drag myself to the same crumbling school that I had attended for 3 years, and see her wondering the halls with her bitchy little friends that she was too kind for. She was far too caring, and seemed to ignore all of the snotty glares that her friends would hurl at me. She would tell them to keep their opinions quiet when they would hiss snarky comments to one another about my beaten-up converse or my ratty brown hair or my obsessive need to make out with Florencia. I'm totally kidding about that last one, by the way, but I still like to imagine what it would be like from time to time....

"Clem!"

Hmm?

"Clem!"

It's probably nothing...

"Clementine you dumbass!"

Oh, shit. Yet again, I'd fallen asleep in one of my English teacher's stupid speeches again. I sighed. "Hey Reggie."
Reggie has been my best friend for years. We're the typical one gruff and one with ADHD best friends.

"Seriously, you need to stay awake. It was literally a 30 minute speech." Reggie sighed.
As if. Mr Phil's speeches could put an elephant in a coma.
We began the slow trudge down the stairs to the cafeteria. Great. Burnt beef patties and greasy corn dogs. Again.

"I still don't know what you see in Flo," Reggie judged with a mouth full of corn dog crust. "She's just another clone of every other girl in this school."
"Easy for you to say." I snapped as I scrubbed the spot I was sitting in all over with an antiseptic wipe. He wouldn't get having a crush on someone who doesn't know you exist. He and his partner Albany have been together for years. They're practically the same person. "And don't talk with food in your mouth, you know it's fucking disgusting, right?"
Yep, or course he just gave me that stupid gap toothed grin that always made me smile. Except this time his gap between his two front teeth was covered with soggy corn dog. Yuckkk.
Albany came over and plopped themselves down next to Reggie. "Hey Reggie, Clem!"
They leaned over the table toward me, it made their ginger curls hang down over their shoulders over the table. I grimaced at the thought of it falling in my food.
"I heard Flo just broke up with her boyfriend. Nows your chance!"
I almost choked on my already dry patty.
"Shut up!?" I shrieked a little too loudly. The people withing 10 feet of our table glanced over their shoulders causing me to shrink into my baggy shirt a little.
"Way to play it cool, Clem." Reggie tutted.
"Don't you understand?" I hissed at him. "Even if she's single, do you really think that she, fucking FLORENCIA, would be interested in me?" I put my head into my elbows and banged it on my forearms a couple times in frustration.
"Hey, you never know, I was talking to her the other day and she said-" dring! Reggie was cut off by the abnoxiously loud school bell warning us for 2 minutes before class. "Shit- I have to get up to the 5th floor for art!!" He shrieked and bolted off, running into everyone within 2 feet of him as he charged through the lunch tables. NO! SHE SAID WHAT??!