"YOU KNOW WHAT, IF I ONLY KNEW YOU'RE LIKE THIS I SHOULD'VE KILLED YOU WHEN YOU'RE STILL IN MY TUMMY!?!" My Mom said, that made me weak, and started to cry "Am I that worthless to you?" I asked her directly looking into her eyes why are these people surrounding me always making me feel like I'm unwanted?
"Why... WHY ARE YOU TREATING ME LIKE THIS?!? WHY ARE YOU SO UNFAIR TO ME?!?" I asked her shouting "TELL ME WHY?!? IS IT BECAUSE PAPA DIED BECAUSE OF ME?!?! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO EXPLAIN MYSELF?!?!" I asked shouting again now I was storming off I went to the kitchen and got a knife I handed it over to my mom
"NOW IF YOU WANT ME GONE JUST KILL ME!!! KILL ME NOW!!!" I said now can't stop crying feeling weak I dropped into my knees as she dropped the knife
"If it wasn't for me, you're not born! So how dare you shout at me like that?!?" She said I looked at her now with empty eyes "IF IT WASN'T FOR ME YOU SHOULD'VE BEEN DEAD!! YOU AND YOUR FAVORITE DAUGHTER!! IF IT WASN'T FOR ME YOU SHOULD BE IN PRISON!! IF IT WASN'T FOR ME YOU'D NOT LIVING IN THIS KIND OF HOUSE!! YOU DID NOTHING MOM!! I DID IT ALL!!" I shouted pointing at her I cried again "You did nothing!! Can you even call yourself a mother?!? No?!? You're--" She slapped me once again, I helped myself up because I knew she wouldn't care even if I slept there for a year. I looked at her with those empty eyes as I felt numb.
"Since Papa died you as my mother died, since in 8th grade the mother I knew died," I said calmly yet coldly.
"You can't even ask me how am I doing? You can't even ask me if am I ok. Because I'm not mom! I'm not!! I've been dying!! I've been suffering fighting battles on my own!! These battles were so suffocating that it came to the point that I wanted to end my suffering but I can't!! It's because I'm thinking of you!! and your daughter!! I'm thinking who will feed them? Who will work for them?? Are they going to be ok once I die? Will Mom finally get a job? But no! You can't even do work!" I said while tears were falling apart.
"You don't even know that I am sick! I am dying and here you are still hating me over the things I don't have any control over. I'm dying Mom, here that? I'M DYING! But all I think about is you!" I sighed and calmed myself once again, i looked at her with a bitter smile I said
"All I think about is you Mom, not myself anymore," I said I got my things and ran out of the house, I ran and run into the abyss.
YOU ARE READING
Habromania
Kurzgeschichten𝐷𝑒𝑙𝑢𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑜𝑓 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑒𝑠 If I die right now, will anyone notice it? Will anyone feel sorry and sorrow for it? If I die right now, will everything change? Or will it worsen the situation? Will the 'What ifs' in my mind disappear and be a...
