Life goes on- A tubbo x fem reader

Chapter 3

tw: panic attack, self harm

y/n pov
you woke up in a cold sweat shaking and crying. you couldn't remember what your dream was about, but by the feelings you had you could tell it wasn't very good. you saw the clock read 5:30 a.m. you tried to sit up in your bed but you couldn't. it took you a few trys to sit up. you grab your phone and tried to dial your mother's phone number but you couldn't. you fumble to the recents tab and see Toby's contact. you shakily press the call button.
Tobys pov
i was brushing my teeth when i heard my phone ringing in my bedroom. "im not sure who'd be calling this late" you say. the clock read 12:30 a.m. the screen said y/n was calling. i wearily picked up.
"hey y/n what's up?"
i looked down on my screen to see a crying and shaking y/n.
"y/n are you okay?!??"
no response
"hello y/n?!"
still no response but I see she's still shaking and trembling. I see multiple years run down her cheeks. oh my god she's having a panic attack. I'm not sure what to do exactly.
"y/n can you hear me?"
she still sits there crying and shaking like earlier. think Toby think. how can you help y/n? after thinking for a few moments I thought maybe Will and Phil would know what to do. I quickly added them to the FaceTime. they both pick up immediately.
"Hey Toby what's up? and whose this y/n person in the call?" will asked.
"yeah I'd like to know too" Phil added
"she's my friend and I think she's having a panic attack. i really need help. she's not responding to me."
"ok Toby calm down first" Phil said calmly.
i didn't realize I was shaking a bit. I quickly collected myself.
"hello y/n can you hear me?" will asked
she just sat there crying and shaking like before.
"ok y/n focus on breathing. breathe with us ok?" Phil said "in and out, in and out, in and out"
y/n started to breathe with us. after a few minutes she was still trembling a but had stopped crying.
"y/n?" I questioned
"I'm really sorry Toby. I didn't mean to scare you. I probably shouldve called someone else but you were right there on the top of my contact list. I'm so sorry. " she spoke very quickly.
"hey, hey, hey stop that." I said with my voice sounding calm but assertive "you are completely fine. I said you could call me anytime right?"
she nodded her head.
"thank you for helping me" she said putting her head in her hands
"you shouldnt be thanking me you should be thanking will and Phil. I didn't know what to do so I added them." I said
"thank you you two. I don't know what I wouldve done without you helping."
"no problem y/n" will shrugged
"if you ever need to talk or need help my phone is always nearby" Phil spoke softly
will and Phil both left the call a moment later.
Y/n pov
it was just you and tubbo in the call now.
"y/n?" toby asked
"yes?"
"you should drink some water"
"yeah I suppose I should"
you stand up and you're dizzy for a moment. you look down at your phone and see a concerned looking toby.
"I was just a little dizzy" you explained
he nods still looking concerned.
you grab your water bottle from your dresser and walk over to your bed. after you sat down you took a few swigs of water. toby finally speaks after a long silence.
"can you explain what happened?" he asked confused
"can i explain later? i'm still tired and i wanna at least try to get some sleep."
"yeah" toby nods understandingly
"bye toby sleep well" you say with a smile
he waves goodbye and ends the call. "you're so dumb. you let toby see the dark side already. he's not gonna want to be around you. you're a freak. a freak that can't even take care of herself after bad dreams."
you leave you room and go to the bathroom. you find your blade and start cutting. cutting until there was no more space on either of your arms. you hadn't cut in months but all of that is gone. you clean yourself up and make it look like you were never in there to begin with.
end of tw