person

chapter one: toxic masculinity

Percy pov:

I strutted down the hall of demigof high school like the king i am, supa swagger! XDXD! all the girls were drooling all over me, but i only had eyes for shrek's sausage...

I casually sashayed down the hall until i collided with this beautiful—-i-I-I-I-i mean nasty fugly ass bitch looking shrek donkey! OOOOOOOOOFFFFF!

My head was spinning and the first thing i realized was that my head was lodged into his hairy pierced crusty musty dusty sausage. YUMMMMMMM—-I-I-I-I MEAN EEEWWWWWWW!!!

fuckwit shit shoot fuc kitty frick Frack frick! i grumbled like the alpha male i am. show my  dominance to this beautiful....my ugly stranger.

"bonjour sea scum...." he scowled and rolled his eyes, crimson dark blood red maroon blush creeping and winding and faltering into his pale white y/n Snow White skin. I looked down and saw that his pants were ripped and his 3 foot disco stick was hanging out. That sucker was huge. Almost as big as gabes. i know because gave introduced me to this stuff LOL XDXD

"YOU GOTTTTTAAAAA PROBLEM JACKSON?!??!??!!93528572fyck shut up stupid XDXD"

"Rawr my beautiful shrek<3"

He then stuck his 3 ft sucker inside of me and I moaned.

everyone threw rotten tomatoes at us cuz we were doing it in the middle of a high school hallway (which is TOTES realistic XDXDXDXDDD) but I didn't care.

annabeth cheered us on as she aggressively made out with piper "YASSSS QUEENS SLAYYYT"

I then saw Jason get railed by his five demon boyfriends at once. Grover was then running around naked yelling "TREES ARE FARTTTTTSSSSS XDXDDDDDDDDDXX"

being the dark mysterious emo tall adhd dyslexic problem i was, i roared in anger like the true beast unsure me and ruthlessly dragged Jason and his sky daddy Zeus into the bathroom. we did a threesome. and yes Zeus is my uncle XDXDXDXDDDDD. Then once everything died down a little, Jason and I found out zeus was pregnant.

Jason yelled "IM NOT PAYING CHILD SUPPORT LOL LIVE LAUGHT LOVE XDXDDXD"

We then walked back to our 8837 dollar mansion and did it in my 8538)27193)639$ lamboudghi. Jason moaned and causes the car to move down the driveway and down to CAmp half blood. Chiron saw us and then threw us into the river as i saved Jason like the swagger alpha male i am.

Jason moaned very manly and gasped in shock.
D-D-D-D-DADDY DRACO?!?!?!???!?
draco whipped out his 9 foot twizzler and roared "COME HERE BOYS XDXDDDDDDDDDF" just as we were about to crawl towards him in our jet black red green blue led multicolored lambo tricycle we whipped our heads around and screamed in shock and longing....
"D-D-D-DADDY DOBBY?!?!?! IS THAT YOU 😱😱😱😱" "DOES HE EVEN HAVE A MAGIC WAND?" Jason whispered softly sweet nothings into my soft perfect ear. We then got to draco and he put in his double 8 ft stick into both of us as daddy dobby moaned in our ears.

"You won't be able to walk by tomorrow" draco whispered into our ears.

o-o-o-o-okay Lucius—i mean draco.

"WHAT THE FUCKWIT DID YOU JUST SAY" draco roared in agony and rage. "DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT RAIL MY FATHAH?!?!? XDXDXDXD"

Then as I was about to answer his question(yes obvi), we saw piper and annabeth in a trees doing it.

"Yes i did daddy. What are u gonn do boooooiiiiii???!?!! XDXDXDXD"
"omg same!" draco said, telling us about his sausage session with Harry pottah

Draco then called shrek over and they both hauled us into the sky as daddy Zeus threw our child onto us and we all died bc we were chosen ones and we had to die to move the story along. Bye XDXDXD I'm so masculine and swagger.