The crisp autumn air cuts through my auburn hair as I contemplate what this all means. What this is all for. I find my thoughts have circling back to that lately. Ahead I see a small playground complete with a simple swing set. So I walk to the swings and take a seat. I use my toes to gently push me back and forth while I admire the night sky. Bright stars shine above and the view eases my stress. I've always felt connected to the stars, they whisper to me that everything is going to be okay.
I almost didn't hear the voice calling out for me.
" ODETTE!" The voice calls and I wince. It's my mother.
She approaches me quickly with an angry look on her face not to mention she was stumbling. I know she's high on something, Xanax, oxys who knows. My chest is filled with anxiety now. Her presence always brings it.
" why the fuck do you think it's okay to leave without telling me?" She scowled
"Mom I'm 19 you don't have to worry about me," I tried to stay strong but tears were brimming my eyes.
"It's not a worry thing it's a respect thing, but you don't care do you?! You just hate me cause I'm a terrible mother?? Oh get over yourself. So many people have it worse than you, you ungrateful bitch,"
The words stung but it's nothing I haven't heard before, In fact I'm quite used to hearing similarly fashioned comments.
My mom grabbed my hand and started to pull me towards home.
"MOM STOP!" I screamed "I'm not coming home" And I meant it, after 19 years of this bullshit I'm finally done I can't take another night.
"Where the fuck else are you going to go ?" She snaps.
"That's my problem. Now just go,"
Reluctantly she turned and walked towards her house. Not before screaming obscenities at me but I blocked them all out. I let out a shaky breath and fell to the ground. Immediately tears streamed down my face in rivers.
