Denali's POV:
"Denali" i swipe in on me and my bestfriend Kahmora's snapchat conversation. The second i see that she wrote my name in the chat I feel my anxiety rise in my stomache. Everytime she does this it ends up bad. "Kahmora" i write back hoping she's just playing with me. " I don't wanna be freinds anymore lol" I feel my stomache drop and my face goes numb.
Today that was a year ago. A lot has happened since. Next week i'm starting in a new school. I'm not very excited about that since i don't really like socialising. That's something no one really knows about me. I don't really enjoy being around most people. Actually, i despise it. Sometimes I don't even like hanging out with my best friends Mik, Kandyand Rosé . Ofcourse no one know this though I always push myself to go out and meet new people because both Kandy and Mik are very social people.
I find myself looking in the mirror wishing i could just go back to bed and watch my favorite series. But no, i push myself to go out. The reason i don't just stay at home is because I hate being alone and i'm scared that's how im gonna end up if i don't come with my friends and meet new people all the time.
My best friend Kandy always forces us to hang out with her boyfriend Joey Jay. At first i hated it but i've actally started enjoying hanging out with him because he's a really funny person. Kandy and Joey always fight or make out wherever we go so it can get really annoying hanging out with them alone.
Today we where supposed to sleep over at my place. This was the first time a guy was in my room that's not my brother or dad so i was nervous he was gonna find something embarrassing. Something that is really scary about hanging out with joey is that he know almost everyone in our city. So if i embarras myself infront of him i'll get a really bad reputation.
I'd noticed the whole day that Rosé was really touchy with me. I didn't think much of it because me and my friends where always touchy with eachother. But this felt different in a way. And i really liked it. Everytime she touched my arm or got close to my face i felt butterflys. We where all hanging out in my room talking to people on omegle when she got really close and just randomly put her forehead on mine and stared into my eyes. It was really weird but sweet in a way. I laughed it off and we continued talking to people.
I got a snap from the guy i've been talking to for a while now. we had met two times but after the second time it felt off and since then he'd ghosted me for three weeks. We had just started talking again a few days ago and i was supposed to meet him again next saturday. " OOOOOO PEARLLLL" ( in this story pearl will be portrayed as a guy so the pronounce will be he/him) ( also i absolutely adore pearl but i couldn't think about anyone else for this role so she might be portrayed as kinda mean )
Everyone gathers around my phone to look at what he sent me " i'm sorry I gotta meet my grandparents on saturday can we meet sunday instead?" he wrote on a snap of him showing he's abs. I snaped back a quick photo of me holding my thumb up and writing "sure". When i first started snaping with him I had the biggest crush and i was always excited to see him. But lately everything has just been off and i've gotten kinda bored. This is the first time i've had something more than firends with a guy so i'm still gonna keep talking with him and hoping the crush comes back.
The night goes on and me and Rosé had been next to eachother, laughing and joking with each other the whole night. The night flew and we all had fun with each other. I started getting really tired and decided to lay down on my bed. I started dozing of to sleep when i felt someone lay behind me. I t was Rosé and she layed in the same position and put her head on my shoulder. We spooned a little bit like i always did with my friends but suddenly she put her han on my waist and then started holding me. I felt goosebumps all over my body and i got alot of butterflys. Why did i get so excited when she started holding me? I've know for a long while now that there was no way i was fully straight but i hadn't really exepted it myself. But theres no way i've gotten a crush on Rosé this fast? I felt really safe and fell asleep really fast.
I woke up getting my stuffed animals thrown on me. When i woke i saw that Rosé has moved in her sleep. She was now sleeping all the way on the side of the bed. When i looked at her I started regretting all the thought I had the night before. I couldn't picture myself dating another girl and definitely not one of my best friends. I decided to talk to Mik for the rest of the night.
I was really annoyed at Kandy. Not only was she unnecassary angry at Joey the whole night, but she had also been really rude to me and everyone else. She was somehow mad at me because Joey had been giving her signals that he liked me. I was getting really uncomfortable at the amount of attention Joey had been giving me. He had been throwing himself on me the whole night (literally) and there was one point when i took a pillow and layed his face over my lower stomache. I got really uncomfortable and shot Mik looks that I wanted him to get off but she didn't do anything. After a while he finally got off and Mik joked and sent me a link to a song that went "get off my dick"
I stayed up the rest of the night and when the clock finally was 12 am they all went home. I had some time for my self now to think so i decided to deep clean my room. My head feel the most clear when i'm cleaning. I sat down in my bed with the window open. I had just taken a shower and the whole moment felt very fresh. "what a weird night" i thought to myself.
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Okay so i hope you all enjoyed that even thougth it was kinda messy lol. <3333333
