Cry Like Me

school

Tap Tap Tap
Tap Tap Tap
Tap Tap Tap
I hear them all walking around me. First day of freshman year, how fun.
15,large breast,decent looking,perfect target. I glance around and see someone staring, we make eye contact but I cant break it. She rolls her eyes and grabs her boyfriend,great first day and already hated. hated? hate?hatehatehatehate?
ክዐክዐክዐክዐክዐ
i don't want to be hated, love love please love me, I don't want to be alone.
Stop.
First period, I'm ok, i'm sitting with a friend and we're laughing, as long as i'm not alone. As long as i'm not annoying.
"Hey! Girls be quiet." Everyone stares
ክዐክዐክዐክዐክዐክዐ
leave me alone don't look. look away stopstopstopstop. What? My leg is bouncing, nononono what if the teacher hates me? hate? hate? How could she, she would never. What if i hurt her, then would she hate me?
I walk down the hallway and i can feel eye staring painful holes through every part of my body. With every step i hear a new insult exit their mouths. She thinks wrong, wrongwrongwrong all wrong i don't want her boyfriend why why why must i be me. should i die? what if i did it in front of everyone here? what if i hurt her? oneoneoneone drop of the oretty red liquid pleaseplease stop. I hear their laughing as I walk away. Keep your head high and stay confident.walk.
How did i get here? math math math always so tedious. I wait for my friend by the door from inside the math room. "Hey come in and sit, you have no reason to be waiting at the door like a lost puppy." the teacher says as he walks past me. Gogogogo grab the pencil nownownow red make it drip form his eyes. what if what if what if. would he yell? D̶o̶ y̶o̶u̶ t̶h̶i̶n̶k̶ i̶ w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ g̶e̶t̶ d̶e̶t̶e̶n̶t̶i̶o̶n̶?̶
"Hey are you ok? you have been really quiet this period."
nononono i wanna see his pitiful little eyes cry oh how prettyprettypretty no.
"i'm fine haha"
Next class, tap tap tap i walk down the hallway and there he is. i have no idea what his name is but i love him, everything about him. I keep walking and i feel as if everyone is looking at me. memememememe why mememe i hate you all. diediedie what if. i shoot, they all start running and screaming.gun?how why nonono now everyone will hate me nonono. finish. i walk around letting bullets fly to every dome i see. how pitiful. you really are pathetic arent you. the sound of bullets falling and watching people stare at me in fear as they beg for their life makes me feel so many things. The way they look at me just makes me want to punish them in every way. W̶a̶k̶e̶ u̶p̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ u̶p̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ u̶p̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ w̶s̶k̶e̶ u̶p̶ n̶o̶w̶ n̶o̶w̶ a̶r̶e̶ y̶o̶u̶ h̶u̶n̶g̶r̶y̶?̶ d̶o̶ y̶o̶u̶ w̶a̶n̶t̶ t̶o̶ b̶e̶ l̶e̶t̶ o̶u̶t̶?̶
n̸o̸n̸o̸n̸o̸ i̸m̸ o̸k̸ l̸r̸t̸ m̸e̸ b̸e̸ p̸l̸e̸a̸s̸e̸ p̸l̸e̸a̸s̸e̸ p̸l̸e̸a̸s̸e̸
how. i'm in the bathroom crying. how did i get here. why am i in so much pain. crycrycrynyou are a pitiful bitch aren't you. no one will ever like you like this. i walk out the stall and look in the mirror. is that me? so so so pretty why did i cry. now my makeup is ruined. damn those whores for putting me through pain. i don't deserve such treatment from pitiful bitches who'd lick my shoes just to live another day.
Here
what
how
blinkblinkblink
somewhere new
i'm sitting in class. You're not meant to be here, this world isn't meant for me. what if. how would they react? a student walks up and shoots themself dead in the brain and their skull flys everywhere. how. would they be sad? mad? happy? maybe laugh? i want to test it. what if i do it?
No
you own this world, you cant leave these people without their god. godgodgod.
I feel blank.... i feel as if i'm watching a tv program of myself with no volume and a blank expression. I do it all. laugh.cry,get angry,grieve yet i still feel blank. not empty or numb, just not really there. I walk down the hallway and they stare. Don't these damned bitches ever get tired of the same shit everyday. spicespicespice it up. lets go chop chop chop on a few fingers and let their screams fill the air like the joy on Christmas. Funfunfun i bet that would be fun.
snap
they are still staring. do i ruin their day? does the sight of me piss them off? nonononyes. yes. yes. how pitiful are these whores.
Wow
Powerful
crycrycry i̶ w̶a̶n̶t̶ y̶o̶u̶ t̶o̶ c̶r̶y̶.̶ l̶o̶o̶k̶ a̶t̶ m̶e̶ w̶i̶t̶h̶ t̶h̶o̶s̶e̶ b̶i̶g̶ b̶e̶a̶u̶t̶i̶f̶u̶l̶ t̶e̶a̶r̶y̶ e̶y̶e̶s̶ o̶f̶ y̶o̶u̶r̶s̶ a̶n̶d̶ r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶e̶ h̶o̶w̶ l̶i̶t̶t̶l̶e̶ y̶o̶u̶ a̶r̶e̶ t̶o̶ m̶e̶.̶
godgodgod
crycrycry feel pain like me
look at every curve of my perfect body and feel sorrow. be sad about me. sad sad sad.
hahaHahAhhhah̶a̶h̶a̶h̶a̶h̶a̶h̶a̶h̶a̶h̶
pathetic.
I walk down the hallway
what time is it? what class? am i in 5th period? 555555
oh wow. she's hot. I watch as she walks with elegance but her hand meets with his. n͟o͟n͟o͟n͟o͟n͟o͟