Ghetto Freddi and the 9 Foot Dildo

Chapter 1

Ayo. Name's Freddi. Freddi Brown. But yo ass better call me Freddi or I'mma fuck you up, bitch.
Anyways, you know bout dat bigass dildo? That shit cost bout 1 mil or 2. I'mma find that shit n buy me a few girls lmao
But srs
Yeah imma right this bullshit down so i can give it to the kids a prostitute gonna have so that gon be coo
K lets start from the beginnin

We was just gettin home from the kentucky fried chicken right
N we just bought some watermelon and we eatin this shit while watchin the basketball right
N like this pussyass bitch come up to us n be like 'where da money' n my mom call him white trash lmao and then he start fuckin wit my mom and my dad come over like "ayo what yo ass doin boy" and he run like a pussy n we just keep watchin
Until
I see it
The golden dildo
It was shinin in the middle of this casserole this bitch eatin so i run over there and i take it n its gone
had to deal wit the popo after the fatass called the cops smh
but from den on i knew
i knew
dat i would find it n be get da moolay
alright mothafuckas lets go to the pre-sent now

the bell bout to ring n im sittin in class watchin porn until the white lady come up and be like "wtf chu watchin fred"
n she make me go to the office lol fatass bitch so i just walk the fuck home and wack there
den i eat some watermelon and drink a beer and count my pot make sure pedro dont break in and take it and i just smoke some crack outside for a min and i go back inside and i see that pussy bitch pedro fuckin my dog right
So i whack his ass lmao and i tell him to get the fuck up before i shoot him
who the fuck said this would be a good story? get yo ass out and wait till chapter 2 dumbshits lmfao