Private Affection

Chapter 1

The first day of senior year. My last year of high school. I couldn't wait to be done. Not so I could escape town; I actually liked where I was from. It was a sleepy town nestled between Charlottesville and Blacksburg in Virginia. Roanoke, Virginia. Despite being bigger than the population of Charlottesville and Blacksburg combined, nobody had ever heard of it. Not having a major college with football team people adored would do that. And I guess if we're being technical, Roanoke is a city, not a small town.

It's nestled in the blue ridge mountains and is actually pretty beautiful. We frequently made the list of top ten nicest places to live, that were still affordable.

It wasn't that I was desperate to leave town. I had amazing parents and an okay twin brother, even if he was a pain in my ass. And a little misogynistic. At least in regards to me. Other girls in school could date and sleep with whoever they wanted; he didn't care or even judge them. It was just me. His little sister who was off limits. And it was total bull shit.

As far as high school experiences went, mine was pretty okay. I wasn't good at sports, but I could play piano, guitar and flute. I also loved to be in the school plays. My popularity was pretty much just attached to my brother's. He was running back for the football team and point guard for the basketball team. He was going to get a basketball scholarship. He already had offers from division one schools all over the country. But he would definitely stay on the east coast.

I was just his younger twin sister. We were born in different years. How was that even a thing? He was born at 11:56 PM December 31, 2002 and I was born 12:01 AM January 1, 2003. It must have been a joke. He lived for it and I despised it.

But if it weren't for my brother, nobody would know my name. I was popular by association only. Girls wanted to be my friends mostly just to get to him. I had all the criteria for a social outcast; he was the only reason I wasn't. I was a band geek, got straight A's, wore glasses and was a solid size fourteen. I didn't have thick thighs like guys claimed to love because I didn't have a flat stomach and narrow waist to go with them. I had a stomach and some rolls.

Maybe my friends really did like me for me. But it was hard to trust anyone when as soon as they got to my house they started asking about him. It was fine really. I just couldn't wait to get to college. I wanted to make a friend on my own, maybe even more than one, not because of who my brother was.

Checking my reflection in the mirror one more time, I sighed. Wasn't senior year supposed to be the best year of your life or something like that? Didn't seem possible with the nerves I was having.

My skirt fell to just above my knee, and the t-shirt I had on had proud feminist written on it and was tucked into my skirt. My hair was its usual mess of brown curls. Mom always tried to get me to straighten my hair for special occasions; the first day of school definitely counted. But there was no point. It would be curly by second period. It wasn't worth getting up an hour and a half early to do it.

I had pink converse on that matched the pink of my shirt.

"Val!" I heard my mom call me. "Come eat breakfast! Y'all are gonna be late."

"Coming!"

I grabbed my book bag and my phone before hurrying down the stairs. Mom had made scrambled eggs, turkey sausage and avocado toast.

"Where's Mikey?" I asked. He was usually always downstairs before me. He needed to get to school early. That was what the popular kids did. They hung around, flirting and gossiping in the school parking lot before first bell rang.

It was ridiculous. But because our parents could only afford one car, I went with him or I took the bus. Taking the bus as a senior with all the freshman wasn't an option. So I went early and either snuck I to the library to read or went to the band room to practice the piano or flute.