He knew nothing.
He never did.
Killer was known to be the most sane person on the crew, the only one who can tame their beast of a captain, Eustass Kid. He keeps everyone in check to see if they are doing well in their job. He is the most caring person Kid could ever think of. Due to his mask, the crew cannot comprehend well on what is on the vice captain's mind. The electric blue colored face cover created a boundary between himself and others, he is only a mere mystery to everyone and not one person can know even the slightest. Not even the closest person he knows.
You can consider Eustass Kid a one hell of a lucky pirate. Despite having a wild personality and wrecking anything and everything he sees, his second-in-command always keeps him sane. He does not know how Killer does it but whenever he is with him, everything felt fine. He never suspected anything. He never did.
Until now
The captain never fancies late night walks, but this very moment was an exception. There was something bugging him and he does not know what it is. It could probably be hunger but he does not felt like eating. Perhaps it was because of the stress? Even he has no idea of this foreign chum in his gut. The only way to solve it was to refresh his thoughs on a short walk around the ship. Kid usually ignores these type of thoughts called 'overthinking'. He did not know why he was being like this. He was feeling anxious.
Kid passed throught the cabins of his men, then to his most trusted comrade, Killer. Standing infront of his comrade's door is giving him an unfamiliar feeling. He shook his head, no, this cannot be. What was he doing. He took a step away from Killer's door until he heard faint noises. Something he never thought he would hear from someone he considered as strong.
Crying. He heard crying.
He did not hesitate to burst in Killer's cabin and froze at the sight before his eyes.
Killer was crying. He was hurting.
Kid never thought he would feel something like this. He was worried.
Killer was curled up on a corner, his face being covered by his arms, crying restlessly. Kid could not believe what he was seeing. Killer's crying? Why? Did something happen? These thoughts keep on swirling inside his head.
"O-oi Killer...!" He ran up to Killer and grabbed the man's shoulders. "What happened? Did someone hurt you? Answer me!"
That is where he got a better look at Killer's appearance. Head wrapped in bandages, leaving only his tear-stained reddish eyes visible. The bandages around his arms slowly began to unroll and revealed the deep cuts of self harm. Kid felt confused, shocked, furious, broken
"Who made you like this Killer, huh? Tell me that fucker's name, I'LL BEAT THEM TO PULP!!"
He never noticed this side of Killer. He never did.
Killer chuckled. He chuckled. Then laughed.
"Oi Killer what are you—"
Killer lifted his head to face his captain. He was still laughing. Kid looked Killer in the eye, "Look at me, Killer." Killer obliged, and looked at Kid straight in the eye, still laughing. But it is not just some laugh. His eyes were crying. The blonde man didn't wear his usual signature mask. This one was new, encraved onto his face, a very painful one.
A mask that hides one's true feelings. Killer was crying.
"Captain..." Killer muttered, his voice strained with pain. Kid felt so hurt. "I'm sorry...I'm like this—"
He was cut off by Kid's sudden movement. Kid hugged him, tightly.
"Don't be fucking sorry for being like this!" Kid began. "Why? Why did you hide all of this? Why didn't you tell me you were hurting?" Kid hugged him tighter. "Tell me everything from now on, I'll fucking listen, Killer!"
After hearing Kid's words, he could not help but to let all of his tears fall. The little droplets that he was afraid to show, fearing the red head will think of his differently. He never told his captain that he was forced to eat the artificial fruit. He does not want his captain to see him vulnerable, especially in a position of a second-mate. He thought he could hide the pain forever. He covered up his sufferings.
Killer felt something damped on his left shoulder. Kid was crying too.
"Shit! That damn Kaido! If only I was there to protect you...! If I only knew you were hurting sooner.. I was so fucking careless!" Kid's voice started to crack, he continued, "I almost fucking lost you, Killer. I love you!"
He did not care anymore. He just wanted the person he cared for the most to be happy. He wanted Killer to be safe. He does not want him to be hurt anymore. He knew nothing. He never did.
The red head wiped away the blond's tears, "Be it an arm or a leg, I don't fucking care which part of my body they will take. I don't want to fucking lose you!" He held Killer's face, caressing it like a fragile glass, "Killer, you don't have to be alone. You don't have to hide this shit! I'll eat this shitty pride and beg Trafalgar to heal you so please, you don't have to carry it alone!"
It's just a peaceful night. The sea was calm and tranquil. The lookouts passed out cradling their now empty bottles. Everyone was asleep. Two men in their twenties were one of them. The moonlight illuminating their curled up figures. Being asleep on a corner, side-by-side and holding each other's arms, with their tear stained faces, silently vowing not to let go of each other, not to hide anything anymore.
end.
thank you for reading
torao05
