From Shields and Thunders (Marvel x reader)

Till Death Do Us Part... Right?

"Love, you can't do this... not to me." You said almost in a whisper, but still sounding so strong and full with pain in the middle of that silent room. Then, you turned around and looked at the man you loved, the man who swore to protect you from any harm, the man who promised you that you would never be sad with him, the man who was talking about protecting another person, talking about leaving everything behind so he could run and protect this other man.

"He's innocent, (y/n), he really is," Steve said while trying to look into your eyes, his serious expression still on his face, and his eyes not caring anymore, it was the first time that he ever looked at you as if you were some soldier not following a simple order, he wasn't looking at you like a husband looks at his husband, he wasn't looking at you with love, he was just looking, trying to figure the situation out, trying his best to end with the best outcome.

"Right now, he's innocent right now, but that doesn't mean that he can just... no face the consequences of his crimes, but even if he's forgiven, he needs treatment, he needs to prove that he won't suddenly change again and kill us all." You said, covering your eyes with your hand, not wanting to see the man you loved and that was leaving you, not wanting to see the room around you, filled with memories of him and you, memories that you built together and that were filled with happiness, feeling that now was starting to feel sour.

"Don't say that... he won't cause any harm, he's free from Hydra and this means that he isn't under their control anymore." He said, almost like a tired teacher trying to explain a formula to the dumbest kid in the class, sounding tired and annoyed.

"Don't talk to me like I'm stupid, Steve... I'm certainly not stupid." You said, your voice also starting to sound annoyed by the whole situation.

"Then don't act like it..." Steve talked back, standing up and going towards the window of your shared apartment, his whole stance showing you that he was getting more annoyed with every word in this conversation.

How dared him? How could he be the one getting annoyed? After all, you were the one losing your husband, you were the one that had to see him go behind this other man, you were the one that was seeing him fly away to protect the man he loved so many years ago. Nobody can really forget their first love, right? Yes, that was totally true and that was one of the reasons you were on edge, but of course, Steve didn't pay attention to that. After all, Bucky needed him, his amazing Bucky needed him and of course, Steve was going to run like always, ready to help him and leave everything behind, ready to leave you.

"How dare you? How dare you to get angry at me when I'm the one who's being left behind?" You asked, also standing up and walking a few steps closer to him, waiting for him to see you, to turn around and look into your eyes and see how harmful he was being.

"Left behind? I'm just trying to help my best friend!" He said turning around, and he looked at you, tears starting to fall from your eyes, hurt and sad expression on your face. He saw all of this but he didn't care.

"Your best friend? Steve, you must really think that I'm stupid if you are telling me he's your best friend. He's your fucking first love, so don't pretend that you are doing all of this just because you think he's innocent, no..." At this point, you didn't care anymore, if he wanted to leave, fine, he could leave, but you would show him how much you were hurting even if you had to yell everything out. "He's your first love and that's why you are doing it!"

"You're being ridiculous." He said with a scoff and grabbed his jacket, ready to leave the room before he did something he regretted.

"Oh, really? Am I being really ridiculous? Or are you willing to admit that you cheated on me with me? Or maybe that you are wanting to get rid of me so you can go and bang him like you always wanted? Tell me, Steve.... Fucking tell me!" You said, getting angrier and angrier to the point you threw a glass to the floor, asking everything in this world that he started being honest, to yell if it was necessary but to be sincere with you.

Steve jumped surprised at the sound of glass breaking, instantly turning around and looking at you shocked by your words, and at that second, looking at your eyes, in a room so silent that you could hear a pin drop, he let out a deep sigh, feeling unable to keep avoiding the end of this conversation, knowing that this was being painful for you and him, knowing that after weeks of being cold and avoiding your caresses and love, he needed to be totally honest.

"I only did it once..." He said, so quietly, so calmed that for a second you thought that you were hearing him wrong, that it was a mistake and that he didn't say that.

"So... you did it... why? Because of the moment? Because he was there and I wasn't? Because he loved you? Or you loved him? Or is it even loved and not love? Or maybe it is because you love him more than me? That's the answer, right? After all, you're willing to cheat, to go against your friends and family, to run away like a maniac and protect that fucking killer!" You started to yell at him, even if you knew that Bucky wasn't a killer, even if you knew he was also a victim and that it wasn't their fault to love each other, even if you knew all of this, you were hurt. The man you loved cheated on you with his first love, and now he was running away with him, leaving you and everything behind because of this person.

"He's not a killer! Do you know why I did it? Because he's Bucky, he's him and you are you, and he's more important than anything else in my world, so sorry if I hurt you but you should have expected this when you married me!" Steve screamed towards you, your words and actions finally making him snap, hurtful words escaping his lips and his expression being totally sour, breaking your heart little by little and just noticing how much he hurt you when he heard you whimper and sob. His eyes looking at you shocked, not because of you, but because of him, after all, he didn't want to hurt you, not at all, you were his little star, the reason he woke up every morning, the reason he kept fighting every time the avengers had faced a big threat, and now, he was hurting you.

"I... (y/n)... I didn't mean..." Steve started to say, hoping that he could fix this mess, hoping that he could make you feel better, just hug you and kiss you and tell you that everything was going to be fine, not wanting to lose you.

"No, you meant it... every word... and I'm... I'm done being the second option, Steve..." you said while taking off your ring and looking around the room, memories all over the place, memories that now were burning and crashing down, just like the whole charade you called marriage. You grabbed your keys, hearing how Steve was trying to stop you, trying to make you stay, to fix everything but, to be honest, you were tired, too tired and you couldn't deal with him at that moment, maybe you wouldn't be able to deal with him ever again.

"Good luck with Bucky..." Were your last words towards him, grabbing your coat close to the door and going out of the place you called home, starting to walk in the middle of the afternoon, looking how everything was getting darker, the day about to end and you thought that maybe, "till death do us part", wasn't as realistic as you wanted.

A.N: This is quite short, so... Sorry about that. Still, hope you like my work and well, keep reading it.