Thirty Four

310 16 4
                                    

Imani

January 1st, 2022

I watched as the fireworks were exploding outside. I had my glass of champagne and I raised it to the sound of my music in the background.

Zendaya's family invited us to their New Years Party, so Dylan and I brought fireworks and drinks.

I have been working nonstop, filming twenty hours a day on Euphoria. I make sure I talk to my dad for at least an hour, every day. He's been telling me to keep writing and recording, so I don't worry about him, but I am.

I am so scared and terrified, I know it's inevitable but I refuse to just surrender to the pain.

Z shook me out of my thoughts and I wiped the tear from my eye. She grabbed my arm and led me to a secluded area. "Hey, Ima. Talk to me."

"I just don't want to accept the fact that my dad is going to die. I spend hours on the phone with him when I can. I- this feels like my mom's death all over again. I am not equipped to deal with another loss." I rambled as she comforted me with a hug.

"I know. I know. My advise, stop letting that run you. You want to maintain a positive relationship and headspace with your dad. You deserve to enjoy his last few moments instead of dread them. Focus on making him smile and smiling." Z says before giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"Thank you Z." I said drying my eyes. She linked our arms and we walked back to the table. Dylan and Tom were arm wrestling and it's the funniest shit.

"You fucking cheated!" Tom exclaimed.

"Dude, you're fucking Spider-Man and you can't pin my arm down." Dylan fired, as I choked.

"Let's not go there, mate." Holland said, drinking his beer. Daya kept her hand on my thigh and I continued to drift off in thought.

I would never be able to forgive myself if my father wasn't at my wedding.

Everyone was talking amongst themselves and I excused myself. I walked inside and passed through a few people and found a restroom. I was having a mini panic attack during to my obsessive thoughts.

what the fuck am i gonna do

he doesn't want me to move the date up. i at least want a picture with him and a smile crept onto my face.

Our engagement party is in March and it could be at my parent's house, since his nurse is moving him home, so he could be comfortable.

We can take the engagement photos with my dad and I'll be content. It's enough to keep me smiling.

I washed my hands and left the restroom. As I am walking back to the table I see Tom and Dylan in an intense conversation while Z is talking to one of her cousin's.

"Hey boo, you okay?" She asked rubbing my back. I nodded and finished the rest of my champagne.

"I just had to calm my brain down." I said in a hushed tone.

"No, Tom. Think about it, if that's the reason that they were stuck on the island, wouldn't it make sense for them to be fugitives." Dylan defended, I glared at Z and she rolled her eyes.

"They're talking about some Netflix show." She answered.

"Dyl, my boy. No. How can they be fugitives and some of them volunteered?" Tom replied. Daya and I started playing Uno with her family, then one of her cousins' punched her friend and we changed the game.
iwas just playing
Few hours later, everyone was leaving while Tom and Dylan were playing Minecraft.

iwas just playingFew hours later, everyone was leaving while Tom and Dylan were playing Minecraft

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