Season 1 Episode 16 - Home(Part 1)

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SUE'S OFFICE

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SUE'S OFFICE

Early that morning before classes began for the day Kelly, Kurt and Mercedes were sitting in front of Sue after she called the three in to talk about somethings.

Sue: "Ladies, what we have here is a grade-A dilemma. Mercedes, your vocal cords have had more fantastic runs than a Kenyan track team, but that look simply will not do. At first I thought it was a subtle homage to yours truly, but now I fear it's some sort of ironic comment."

Mercedes: "Ms. Sylvester, I'm just not comfortable in those Cheerios skirts. They don't fit me right."

Kurt: "Mercedes, you shouldn't feel embarrassed about your body."

Mercedes: "Embarrassed? No, no. I'm worried about showing too much skin and causing a sex riot." she tells them causing the three students to giggle.

Sue: "How do you three not have a show on Bravo? Here's the skinny. Splits magazine, after much campaigning by one Sue Sylvester, has named me cheerleading coach of the last 2,000 years. In seven days reporter Tracy Pendergrass will arrive on campus, and my new star singer will have lost 10 pounds, and be in a gender-appropriate cheerleading uniform, or she is off the team."

Kurt: "Ten pounds?"

Kelly: "Are you serious?" Kelly and Kurt ask over one another before Sue continues.

Sue: "You could stand to lose a few too, kiddo. You got hips like a pear. And Female Schuester, you need to lose the purple hair. I can't have someone associated with my Cheerio's sporting colors like that. It's unnatural."

Kelly: "Yeah, not gonna happen." she muttered but it went ignored by the coach as Sue just continued.

Sue: "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to put in a call to the Ohio secretary of state, notifying them I will no longer be carrying photo I.D. You know why?" she asked them and then was met with a brief silence before she clearly stated, "People should know who I am."

~~~~~

CLASSROOM

Before history class, Kelly was at her desk with her earbuds in, listening to a Beatles Greatest Hits album while also circling some mistakes on a yearbook spread. Not long into The Beatles' 'Can't Buy Me Love', she sensed someone sit besides her which she thought was strange seeing that most days nobody sat next to her in this class. Kelly then looked up and saw Jesse causing the purple haired girl to let out a groan.

Jesse: "Well hello to you too." he greeted with a smirk.

Kelly: "What are you doing here?"

Jesse: "I'm in this class."

Kelly: "Shouldn't you have already taken world history? This is a sophomore class."

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