Dying words - Lelouch and Suzaku

I love you so.... Please let me go

Format of this fanfic-
It is written from Lelouch perspective so "I" isn't the reader it's him. Also his thoughts/actions are italicized.
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Hope you enjoy!!🤍
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I didn't think things would turn out like this.

We were childhood best friends for God's sake.

I never imagined him to become a dog for the
government.

And I a-

......

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Lelouch or Zero?

I can't tell.

But there was always one person I was hoping who could.

He who makes me come back to my senses.

How would he feel if he found out I was zero? Would he be disappointed..? Mad?

Oh he'd be mad for sure. Even I knew that.

Well it's not like I really need to wonder, I'm already experiencing it.

*back to the present*

"LELOUCH! HOW COULD YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS? WHY HAVE U BECOME SOMETHING LIKE THIS?" Suzaku yelled at me in anger.

I couldn't answer. My smart tongue had suddenly gone numb.

It's like all that was happening was all in my head and I couldn't find a way to come back.

"Do you hate me?" I asked in a calm tone.

"What?" Suzaku replied, breaking his glare at me.

"DO YOU HATE ME?" I repeated fiercely.

"FOR WHAT I'VE DONE, WHO I AM, THE WAYS I'VE HURT YOU" I said.

Suzaku: "Oh no you don't. YOU DO NOT GET TO PLAY MR.HURT AND DAMAGED AFTER ALL YOU'VE DONE TO ME!"

"TO YOU? Mere lies are what you care about? Nothing of what I did was supposed to hurt you-"

"WELL IT DID! It did.... And you're still hurting me. After all you've done I still can't hate you. Loving you is like a curse Lelouch. I now know who you really are and I still can't break loose from it." Suzaku said, looking down.

Love?

Suzaku loves me?

I don't know what to say or think anymore. I don't even want to think about it.

"Lelouch", Sukazu called out.

I turned away.

"Lelouch!" he said once more.

Nope,nope. I refuse to hear it.

"Look at me Lelouch," he said, relaxing his eyes.

Stop it! I yelled in my head as tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I just told you I love you" he said with a strain in his voice.

I finally turn around to meet a crying Suzaku.

"And that's why I have to be the one to kill you."

I could see that he was hesitant to pull the trigger.

He was shaking and the tears from his eyes wouldn't stop falling. He started breathing heavier and the hand he was holding the gun with was shaking more than ever.

*thud*

He dropped the gun.

"I-I can't do it" he said, falling to the ground.

"I don't want to be the one to kill you. I love you too much for that."

He was weeping. It hurt seeing him like this.

I wanted to reach out my hands to comfort him but I couldn't. These hands are stained with the blood, cries, and lives of thousands of people.

Hands like these shouldn't have the right to touch someone like him.

"It's okay Suzaku," I told him.

"You won't be the one to kill me," I said as I picked up the gun he dropped beside him.

"Wha- what are you doing?" Suzakua asked him with a concerned look.

"LELOUCH!"

*bang*

I felt cold, I was bleeding rapidly from my chest.

It's getting dark.

Ahh, I'm getting colder.

I could still feel Suzaku shaking my body, yelling at me to get up and trying to call for help.

Before I gave out I reached out my hand to his face.

"It's going to be okay," I said, coughing up blood.

"How can you say that when you're dying," he said, pulling me closer.
"I don't want to live without yo-"

I pressed my lips on his before he could finish.

"Sorry about the taste of blood," I chuckled.

"Take care of my sister for me okay?"

"Don't whine or cry anymore, I don't want my last image of you with you crying." I said to him, smiling.

He squeezed my hand and pulled me to his chest.

"I love you," he said with eyes of heartbreak and acceptance.

"I've loved you since we were kids," I said.
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Those were my dying words which brought tears to Suzaku's eyes.