Leaving you

Summer 2006

Cole 

The last time I saw her....

The last few days of summer before senior year started. I was led on my bed waiting, listening to music, making plans in my head, Addie would appear at some point. She always did. Addie was my bestfriend, the girl next door and the girl I have loved since childhood. I couldn't wait to tell her how I felt, I wanted her to know, I was going to be by her side for the rest of our lives. I remember my parents gathering my brothers and I the morning after they had moved in next door. They took us over to meet the new neighbor's and I got to meet Addie for the first time. I had seen her the day before but she was sleeping in her mums arms. I remember finally getting to look at her and seeing how small and fragile she was. My parents introduced us all, Addie's parents seemed nice, but I really wanted to talk to Addie. We stayed for a while at the house, my brothers had gone to play outside, but I stayed with Addie and played games. As we were leaving to go home, I turned to look at her and said "do you want to be bestfriends?" she smiled at me and replied "ok". I reached out to hug her, she froze when I put my arms around her, but smiled when I moved to leave. The window opening shook me from my thoughts, Addie was here. 

I stood up from the bed and moved to help her get in the room. She reached for me and pulled me into a hug. "What's wrong? is everything ok?" I could feel her body shaking against me, we stood in each others arms for a long time, me just holding her. After a while her grip on me loosened and I knew she was ready for me to let go of her. I pulled back and lifted her head towards me so I could see her face, it was clear she had been crying. I pulled her towards the bed to sit down with me, with her head resting against me, I waited for her to speak. She never did. instead she reached out and grabbed my hand, putting it against her face. She moved closer to me "Cole, I.." I watched her face as she struggled to tell me what she needed to say. The words never came, I caressed her face as she looked into my eyes, I could see the sadness in her eyes and wanted to take it all away from. She leaned in to me and kissed me, I knew it! My heart was pounding, she felt the same. 

I woke up the next morning, smiling at what Addie and I had become. I couldn't wait to see her face, pull her close and tell her how I felt about her. But the other side of the bed was empty and cold, she was gone. In her place was a note.

Cole, 

For so long I have loved you, you're my bestfriend, the one I share everything with. Except this I have been keeping a secret from you and now I have to leave, I came to you last night to say goodbye. I want you to know that I am happy and free now. Last night meant everything to me and I will always will remember it and smile. 

Love always, 

Addie

She was gone, and she had taken my heart with her. I was broken.