I'm Only Happy When It Rains

Chapter 1

Warning: Sexual Content

Sebastian

The familiar saloon was brimming with people. Friday night was the night to be here and the past years didn't change that at all. As usual, Sam had booked them their regular pool table like nothing had happened. Like college never happened. Like Sebastian never put their friendship on pause and shut them out to focus on studying. Everything seemed frozen in time. Abigail still sat on the couch, watching the two play, sipping on a cold drink and Sam was still just as terrible at pool as when he left.

Sebastian had been away from the valley for three years, working hard on his degree in computer science at a neighboring town a few miles away. He was accepted into an accelerated program and graduated in three years, opting not to come home for summers to work on getting through all his credits. Yet, coming home top of his class and highly employable, nobody at home was really proud of him, except for his mom, who was proud of him for leaving the house when it wasn't raining. In fact, while he was gone, Demetrius had become even more overbearing and Maru was even more of the favorite genius child. Something he didn't know was humanly possible.

"It absolutely sucks, Seb, you've been back for how many days and still no graduation party?" Sam griped, lining up his shot. "What is taking them so long?"

Sebastian chalked up his stick while he waited for Sam to take his shot, replying. "It's just as well, you know how I get about big crowds and being around people."

Hell, just being here on a busy Friday night was frying him enough. It took a lot of emotional control to get his hands not to shake in nervousness. He was never one for crowds of people, but he knew he didn't want to let his friends down by bailing out.

"Yeah, but it's college, Seb." Abigail replied. "My mom and dad won't shut up about my grades."

"That's because you're an only child, Abs." Seb defended, watching Sam completely wiff his shot and almost scrape up the green on the table. "You don't have anyone competing with you. Maru is a shoe-in at any Ivy League she applies to. I just graduated from ZuZu City college and came home with a motorcycle and debt."

"Don't be so hard on yourself." She said, standing up to stretch, letting the black tee shirt she was wearing ride up her midriff, something both of them didn't miss. "I'm getting a refill, do you want anything?"

Both Sam and Seb shook their heads no, watching her wonder off.

"You're probably happy she is wearing more skirts with no tights." Sam quipped to Sebastian once Abigail was out of earshot.

"Can it." Sebastian said, leaning down to take his shot.

"Just saying, she's filled out nicely since high school."

Seb completely missed his shot, practically tossing his cue stick across the room.

"So you have noticed." Sam said with a chuckle, watching Seb stomp over to pick up his stick.

"You want me to go again?" He asked, ignoring Sam's previous statement.

"Yeah, go again." Sam agreed. "Are you ever going to ask her out? Instead of just fantasizing about her?"

Little did Sam know, Sebastian DID ask her out. Well... Abigail asked him out. They quietly dated all throughout senior year of high school, taking a break for college and started back up a few days after he came home. But Sebastian was a private person, he didn't like gossip so he asked Abigail to keep quiet about it.

"Maybe." Seb said with a sly smile, leaning down to take a clean shot, sinking three balls in one go.

Abigail came back with another drink in tow, sinking back into the couch to watch Sebastian completely dominate Sam in pool for the rest of the night.

Around ten, Gus declared last call, and patrons started to make their way out of the bar. After bidding Sam farewell, Abigail turned to Sebastian.

"Are we sneaking into yours or mine tonight?" She asked, a sly smile painted on her face.

"Neither," Seb said. "Sorry to disappoint you, but I have to be up for my first day of work tomorrow."

"On a Saturday?" Abigail pouted before a cheeky grin spread across her face. "Wanna do a quickie by the lake?"

Seb didn't even have to be asked twice before taking Abigail's hand, leading her out of the bar up to the mountains where he lived.

He didn't expect their relationship to turn so sexual so fast. In fact, everything happened a little too fast for him to even think about it to get anxious about it. Within three days of being home, she had broken down the hard walls he put up between them in college, asked him back out again, and convinced him to do the deed with her. Almost every day since then they'd been in each other's beds, mostly his because her parents were weird, and sneaking each other out in the morning. He guessed they were making up for lost time. In high school, the most they ever did was make out due to his nervousness and anxiety, but Seb was enjoying the pay off of all the times she turned him on and left him hard because of her parents curfew when they were younger.

They carefully crossed the planked lake and settled down on the small island, making sure Linus was preoccupied in his tent. Sebastian quickly unzipped his pants, rolling on a condom before pulling off Abigail's white satin panties.

"Don't throw them in the lake this time." She hissed as he tossed them aside, pulling up her skirt.

He muffled her protest with a kiss, letting his hips do the talking until both of them were climaxing. He rolled off of her once he finished, pulling off the used condom and zipping up his pants. He fetched a cigarette out of his pants pocket and lit up, looking up at the lit sky.

"Ugh, you jerk, they're all wet and muddy." Abigail said, picking her panties up out of the lake bed, ringing them out before pulling them back up. "Thanks a lot."

Seb stifled a laugh at her, taking a long drag.

"It's a good thing I love you." She said.

Sebastian began to choke on his hit, sitting up quickly. Love, she said love. While he was sure he felt feelings for Abigail, he wasn't too sure those feelings were love just yet. After all, it had only been a few days of them being back together. He liked her a lot, for a long time, spending many years daydreaming of the two of them fucking the shit out of each other, while also avoiding her advances. But love? Everything was suddenly moving very fast for Sebastian, both metaphorically and physically.

"Are you okay?" She asked, quickly getting down to help him get the smoke out of his lungs.

"Yeah... I'm... fine." He said, but he was far from it. He felt completely anxious about the new development. He didn't want to say it back to her, especially if he might be lying to make her feel better about it, but he didn't want to leave her hanging.

"You don't love me back?" She asked.

"It's... not that I... don't..." Seb tried to say in between coughs. His anxiety was truly getting the better of him as his ears began to ring. The world was spinning around him as his pupils dilated. "I can't say it right now." Was all he managed to get out.

Abigail pouted, unaware of the pure unadulterated terror he was experiencing. He wanted to keep it that way.

She leaned back on her haunches and sighed. "Well I feel that way towards you and if you aren't ready to say it back, it's okay. I should be getting home though."

She got up and walked off, leaving Sebastian alone to sort out his panic, not even a kiss goodbye. He could tell she was salty and he should probably feel awful for making her feel that way, but the only thing he could think about was the crushing tension he felt in his chest. He hated that he couldn't lie to her. But If he had lied, it would feel much worse.

He stood apprehensively, his legs felt like jello. He managed to make it to his front door and down the stairs to his cellar, before collapsing into bed, wishing he had just opened up to her so she could understand, but she probably wouldn't have understood, no matter how well he explained it. Nobody ever truly did.