Bullets and A Broken Bone

We Must Be Killers

I hold my gun in front of me. Just how Bellamy taught me. Body steady and legs locked. The Grounder in front of me lowers his bow and so do I. Someone shouts something in their language and he runs through the woods, perfectly disguised from my eyes. I hear the steady pace of horses and leave as well. I hold my pack tight to me and run to who knows where. My feet take me to the dropship. Incinerated, my boots crunches against the ashes of Grounders and the Sky People. It is deserted. The only creature that steps here are some wolves and me. My hand goes to the plastic in the entrance and it swings as I push through. I climb up to the second floor and through my pack on the floor. My hand flies to my gun when I hear the small cough. I whirl around to face the person and Bellamy's hand goes to lower my gun.

"Clarke," he says, taking a step back. "I thought eventually you would come by the dropship." Actually, I usually slept in our old camp, but I choose a different place to settle in every night.

"What is it, Bellamy?" I say, putting my gun on a makeshift table. It was the table where I took care of Finn's poison. I dig my nails into my palm to stop thinking about it. Bellamy raises an eyebrow at me and takes a seat.

"I don't know," he runs a hand through his hair. I nod, and shrug out of my jacket. I go to get one of the rations we left here. I rip open the plastic and take a bite of the dried fruit. "I just see you when we go hunt and you're making me go crazy."

I bite down on my lower lip hard." And how exactly am I doing that?"

"You've seen me too Clarke. I know that. You're out here close enough to see but so out of reach." Bellamy looks for something in my face. Recognition? Longing? Fear? I can see he doesn't find whatever he was looking for. Besides, this Clarke is someone who even I don't know.

"Okay, well what do you want, Bellamy?" I sound tired. Well, I am tired. Very tired. Bellamy stands and he reaches out for my hand. I pull myself together for this and take his hand. He pulls me in for a hug. My face nestles into the crook of his neck and his arms encircle me. One hand goes to cup my head. Suddenly, I'm brought to my father. He hugs me in this way. Protective. He gives me a promise. I remember him holding my shoulders steady before he walked away. Before he was floated.

Bellamy pulls away and he looks as broken as I am. This was it then. It would always come back to a tragedy. My father, Wells, Finn, and now Bellamy is slipping out of his safety. I can't lose him as well. Bellamy grins.

"That was it, Princess." He tells me. He swings his rifle over his chest. "Please come back inside." He climbs down and I'm left in a daze. I climb after him and jog to meet him.

"What the hell, Bellamy? You think you can just find me and leave like that?"

He turns around and a smile is plastered on his face. "All I wanted to know is if you were alive."

I shake my head." Well, I'm alive. And was doing well on my own, but now that's been ruined as well." Bellamy takes two steps forward and captures my hand.

"I'm sorry. I just-" He groans," I throught I was dreaming when I saw you running through the forest." It's been a month since I have left and Bellamy stills thinks of me as some dainty princess.

"It was good to see you Bellamy," I say. Bellamy's face goes intense quickly.

"What we have all done may seem like it's all we are, but it isn't. We are not killers." His face is soft. Sorrow claims him as their own. Bellamy still does not understand. He has not understood this ever since we landed on the ground.

Tears threaten to come out." You don't understand, Bellamy. We must be killers."

"No we don't."

"If we want to survive," I blow a strand of hair from my face," we must be killers."