Hellsing reader inserts

Jan X Reader

I was dragged to a dance club by a friend of mine. She was off dancing with random people and I was just chilling at the bar. Men would often come up and flirt with me; I had no interest. They weren't funny or charming, just looking for sex, which I did not want. The seat next to me was taken by a guy in a track suit, with a beanie on. It took him a while to notice me. "Oh, hey! What are you doing here alone? Date ditch you?" I rolled my eyes to him; "Yeah something like that." He laughed. "I can say the same for myself. My brother never liked partying... and it's not fun with out him." I let out a hum and turned back to the bar. "I'm Jan by the way, my brother Luke couldn't be bothered to have a good time, kinda like you." I rolled my eyes again. "I just got tired of being flirted with." I wanted to make my point clear, not interested. "Well, if not being flirted with is your request, I'll play our date that doesn't know how to flirt." I glanced back to him. "Right, sounds convincing." He turned to me, his piercings shining gold in the light. "I can always tell you some weird shit I know. Like this one dude went to a plastic surgeon and had part of his skull cut out and replaced with a plastic case so you could see his brain and shit!" Now this was starting to get interesting. "And to top it off he had a horn implanted on his forehead! He looks like a freak now!" I smiled to him, his enthusiasm was a nice change from the other guys. "I've seen old photos of people with real, natural grown horns." His mouth dropped a bit. "You've got to be shitting me! No way a human can come out the pussy with a horn on their head!" I laughed at his phrasing of that sentence. "I went to high school with a guy with six fingers on each hand." Jan immediately recognized the condition. "Hexadactyly! That's so cool! I have a friend with syndactyly, or connected fingers, on each hand. He's really embarrassed about it, but it's just so fucking cool!" I laughed a bit, he was really interested in this kind of stuff. "I cannot wait for prosthetics to catch up with sci-fi movies! How fucking cool would it be to lose you hand and then have it replaced like fucking Skywalker's!" His excitement was contagious. "I know a lot of people who would agree with that." He laughed. "Yeah, Doc is so self conatus about his hands. He has this really bad habit of biting his index finger when something goes wrong; they're all scared up. Makes me worry about the guy." Jan, seemed nice, even though he had a foul mouth. "You know it's weird; most girls would have gotten up at this point and walked away from me." I shrugged to him. "It's your enthusiasm." He laughed. "Man, I would love to have a horn on my head. Crazy people have so much fucking fun. They say blonds have the most fun, but from what I've seen of my brother and the other blonds I work with it's not really that true." I chuckled. "So, now you're a philosopher." He bursted out laughing. "Awl, hell no! That's my brother's job. Fucker loves that shit." I smiled to him. "Two sides of a coin I see." Jan smiled back. "Want to blow this place? I know a really good twenty-four hour diner not far from here." I thought for a moment. "As long as you keep talking weird shit to me." He jumped up. "Awesome! I can totally fucking do that!" I followed behind him; tonight was actually going to be a good night.

----------

Idk how quickly these will be coming out. It depends on ya'lls suggestions and the ones I get off of my tumble Hellsing blog, random-hellsing-blog. Do feel free to leave suggestions here. I'm not quite sure what I will and wont do, just yet, when I am I will leave a rules page.