Love Will Bring You Home

1995

A set of stairs gave way to a small and crowded loft among the rafters that overlooked the set of stage 24. The space was used mainly for the storage of props and scenery. Against the far wall sat a black leather couch. Over the past year, the loft had become their escape - their safe haven. It wasn't much to look at but it was their special place that belonged just to them. After long rehearsals or shoots when everyone else went home, they would sneak up the stairs and spend hours lying on the couch in each other's arms, cuddling, laughing, talking about life, and just enjoying each other's company. This particular night's meeting held a much different tone though.

--

She sat on the couch staring blankly. He didn't know what exactly she was looking at. All he knew was that she wasn't looking at him.

"Jen, please say something."

It was the silence that bothered him the most. As she finally looked up at him, he found himself in the dark corners of her eyes that sparkled like a thousand stars on a clear night. Her face glowed in the otherwise dim room, rendering him helpless. He fought like hell to keep his rationality in check.

"What do you want me to say, David? What am I supposed to say that makes this any better?"

In an attempt to console her, he repositioned himself on the couch to face her. His knee brushed her leg but that was the only part of him that touched her. The intensity of the moment weighed him down as he noticed a tear begin to well up in the corner of her eye.

"Jen, look at me."

He lifted his hand and gently tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Her bright blue eyes held his gaze as a tear rolled down her cheek. He reached for her hands and held them tightly as they intertwined with his own.

"You know how much you mean to me... how much you will always mean to me. You know things would be different if time were on our side. If we were anybody else or in any other situation, I wouldn't think twice about making you mine forever."

Her face softened and she smiled at him, closing her eyes in a fleeting moment of surrender.

"I know, Schwim. This is just so unfair."

She paused and looked away, as if she was recalling a distant memory.

"The past year has been one of the best years of my life. Obviously because of the show and becoming so close with all of you guys, but mostly...because of you."

Her words melted his heart. How could such a perfect woman like Jen be saying these words to him?

"I know everything had to be kept a secret, but it was kinda fun that way, ya know? It was like an escape from reality. I don't want to go back to a reality that you aren't a part of."

He took a deep breath. It took every fiber of his being to not kiss her.

He had kissed her many times before but now he knew that it was off limits and always would be, which made him want it even more.

This beautiful woman sitting right beside him, staring back at him, required him to find all of the strength he could muster to be professional and put the job first. After all, he had no choice. Jimmy Burrows, one of the directors, told him that if he cared about the show at all, it had to stop. Apparently their interactions were less than inconspicuous around the cast and crew and people had started to figure it out. They had always been playful and flirty with each other, but once their characters started developing feelings for each other, they couldn't help but to continue the show once the cameras stopped rolling. They tried to be careful but they both admitted they were a bit too obvious at times.