dealing with the aftermath of years of abuse

okay

dealing with the aftermath of years of abuse

you will come across families in the park or at restaurants that it will hurt to look at because they are happy. you will need to turn away because it sickens you to look at what you wanted for years.

there will be songs that feel like home: real home, not the empty shell you grew up in that is scattered with broken dreams and false love. listen to them until the lyrics are tattooed on your heart and your veins pulse with the melody; until the singer's voice echoes in your head long after the song has ended.

there will be days that are almost unbearable. you will want to leave and never come back. don't. keep trying in whatever ways you need to, but do not give up.

you will still be afraid of loud noises, and you will still flinch harder than you should when people make sudden movements near you. it's okay.

your father's voice will still make your breath catch in your throat and your eyes prickle with tears. it's okay.

you will still be broken. you will still yearn for love and your thigh will sting long after the bruise shaped like a handprint has faded. it's okay.

you will be okay. it may take years or even decades, but eventually you will wake up almost every morning without wanting to go back to sleep forever. you will not be okay every day, but that's okay.