DEAL GONE [[HYPERLINK BLOCKED]]

Chapter 1: Life Changer

You patiently wait for the lyft to arrive as you check the app again in regards to the established meeting time.

3 minutes? That's not too bad.

You put your phone away and gather your belongings as you make your way to where the planned interaction would take place. A man in a gray vehicle pulls forward and asks for your name. You check the rear of the car for the bright pink lyft sticker plastered on the mirror. Much to your relief, the sticker is there.

"Oh, um I'm [y/n]." The driver nods and turns his head away from you to face the road. You step in, now diagonal from him.

After some driving around, the lyft driver drops you off near an alley. "Wait, this isn't my stop." You claim as you turn to face the driver.

He looks at you before responding with, "you paid to be driven here." Being the un-confrontational person that you are, you decide not to press further. Gathering your belongings once more, you decide to leave the gray car and walk into the alley, hoping for the best. The car drives off, leaving you alone in the darkened area. Taking a deep breath, you step forward and map the location of your house so you can figure out how far you are from here to there.

Crap. 27 minutes? I'm alone and have no means of self defense. Well, if I die, then I guess I die.

As you walk into the alley, you notice a large dumpster. Having some leftover trash in your right pocket, now would be the best time to throw that out. You reach into your pocket and make your way to the trash. Tossing it out, you hear some rustling coming from within. Naturally, this startles you as you take a few steps back, away from the dumpster.

"HEY! HEY!! CAN'T A DARKNER [[As Great And Excellent Of A Seller]] AS I AM GET SOME GOOD REST?" A small man emerges from the piles of trash, rubbing his eyes before readjusting his glasses.

"I'm sorry about that. I didn't know you uh-... lived here." You stammer out before placing a hand behind your neck.

"YOU BETTER BE!! WAIT A [[Hot Second]]!! YOU THERE!! BE A [[Valued Customer]] AND WON'T YOU BUY FROM ME?!?!" He leaps out at you, reaching his small hands upwards towards you.

You stare in confusion before letting out a small sigh accompanied by the word what. The small man walks closer and puts a hand behind his back — a... handshake?

"EXCUSE MY [[Improper Greeting]] STRANGER! FEAR NOT!! I AM SPAMTON G. SPAMTON!! THE [[Greatest SalesmanIn1997]]!! AND WHO MIGHT YOU BE?"

Geez... this guy seems too ecstatic to be meeting a new person. Not to mention his strange speech pattern

"I'm (y/n)," you say, slightly bending downwards to shake his small hand.

Such a strange man.

"MY, MY!! WHAT A [[Lovely And Generous]] NAME!! WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED IN A [[HYPERLINK BLOCKED]]??" He blurts out, still holding onto your hand, smiling. You begin to notice aspects regarding his appearance like his duo colored glasses with one lense having a bit of a warp to it. His dark black hair is slicked back, and his suit appears to be neat — despite coming out from a garbage bin.

"Um, maybe another time, Spamton."

"AH, BUT WAIT!! MIGHT I OFFER YOU SOMETHING JUST AS [[Valuable]]?"

You nod your head rather hesitantly. You don't know this man after all.

"AHA!! I KNEW I STILL HAD IT!!" He finally lets go of your hand and turns away from you. "I SEE YOU ARE [[All Alone]]. MIGHT I PROPOSE A TRADE, (y/n)?" He pauses for a bit before turning around, waiting for your response.