Because of you

I walked the long of a black tunnel; my heart embroidering a sick and fearful feeling of sinking. But it all seemed so unreal. It all looked like it would fade away any moment; but the feeling… was real.

I shut my eyes for a fraction of seconds; Reciting a silent prayer in hopes to see the light at the end of this black tunnel.

My heart nearly jumped out of my chest when I a spot of light appeared in my eyesight.

My head commanded my legs to move faster, and I found myself running towards the spot of light that slowly got bigger and bigger as I approached.

My head glanced in all directions my heart pushing against my chest in unexpected excitement.

My head wandered to examine the area at the end of the black tunnel. Up, down, right, left.

It was a deserted place. Lost in time. It was so beautiful, yet so lonely.

It seemed to me time stood still as I stood in front of this sad yet beautiful image.

I walked farther into the decor my eyes curiously wandering around the area.

The sky was of a grayish depressing color which matched its brown solid surface; each step I took was careful not to damage the picture my mind created of my current emotions. It was so perfect it sent shivers down my spine. My sub consciousness truly knew me best; better than I even knew myself.

I walked further away slowly getting away from the exit of the black tunnel that had now disappeared.

Silence. It was  all so silent. A dead silence. Nothing but the screaming sound of the wind rushing past my ears.

I wandered around with no direction and for what seemed like hours.

The land was so bare; as mere as the thoughts of you and me. And all of the questions left unanswered, made me wonder how it all could be. You and I.

My usually over-the-clouds mind wouldn’t wonder; it’s being wounded from the broken dreams and fantasies. Just because you left them alone. You left me.

I walked farther away, noticing tall formations rising from the ground. I hurried closer.

As I approached closer, the sculptures grew in space and my memory slowly recalled the figure ahead.

Huge ribs lay in front of me. Somehow prehistoric looking, they arose from the ground.

I walked in between them; fearful it would break apart any moment now, I looked upwards every one and another minute.

Somehow, part of me hoped for it to just fall apart right now and bury me. The other part of me feared to never see the sunlight again.

It still wanted to wake up every morning and admire the sun’s dazzling shine. Another part of me didn’t want to get up anymore and see the sun every morning; it wanted to dwell in the darkness. Forever.

I continued my walk through the giant ribs, my heart more confident at the thought, ‘if I die, you wouldn’t even mind at all’; I took a deep breath and somehow swallowed my words the moment I thought them.

Farther away, laid a shovel on the light brown hard mud.

So lonely there on the deserted land, it begged me to touch it and for once in a lifetime, use it for what it was meant to be used; Digging.

I picked it up and pushed my right foot on the silvered material, pushing it down into the ground.

My feet exerted force in getting themselves off the ground. My black leather boots slightly sliding like I where skating on ice.