"So, let me get this straight, you want a chocolate cake. In the shape of a heart. And you want me to write 'fuck you' accross it?"
My best friend is standing accross the counter from me, nodding slowly as I repeat her order back to her for the tenth time.
"Yes. Exactly that."
"Why?" Is all I can muster up.
My usual requests come from blushing bride to be's grinning over a sketch of a five tier, crisp white, floral embellished tower of cake or a 6 year old who just wants their mother to hack into a unicorns head for their birthday. But this is completely uncharted territory.
"Because, Liv. I know he's sleeping with that girl next door and I hate him."
"But why cake?" I tip my head slightly, still trying to weigh up what the hell brought her into my kitchen.
"Its funny." She shrugs.
"A big, chocolately fuck you." He laughs a little to herself as if its an inside joke.
"Fine, I'll do it." I nod and she claps her hands together like an excited child.
"Give me 3 days?"
"If I can stand looking at him that long." She rolls her eyes.
"You're the best."
I stare down at the sketch on my paper, a huge chocolate heart, smothered in our signature fudge icing, a red piped border and the huge red piped letters- and then I pull my ingredients from the cupboard and I get to work.
--------------------
"This is amazing." Emmie hasn't stopped laughing since she arrived.
"I mean its just stunning."
The cake is sitting in a box on my counter, a pretty red bow sitting over the top of the clear plastic window, the two of us peering in at it as if its a bomb.
"I mean, it's what she asked for." I turn to my sister, hoping for once she'll give me some supportive words of encouragement.
"I'm taking a picture." She whips her phone from her pocket, snaps a picture and begins frantically typing away.
The doorbell rings through the apartment and my stomach turns as I swing the door open on Mia.
"Is it ready? I've told him I've got a surprise for him."
"Oh it's a surprise alright." I scoff as I lead her into the kitchen.
She peers over the box, stands in silence for a moment, and then bursts into a fit of laughter.
"Oh Jesus Liv it's perfect."
I breathe a sigh of relief.
"Its amazing, you're a genius." She beams at me, cradling the box to her chest.
"Let me know how it goes I guess." I hand her a business card to pass on to friend and close the door behind her.
"What the hell!" I finally burst as Emmie pours two glasses of wine and hands me one.
"That was honestly an experience." She shakes her head as she bounces down on the couch, flicking on the TV ready for our usual Friday girls night in.
"I mean, it was fun to make something other than a sickly sweet loved up wedding cake."
"I could absolutely get behind break up cakes." She nods at me.
"I cant see it taking off." I shrug.
After copious amounts of wine that Emmie seems to be pouring from a bottomless bottle we finally crawl to bed. I place a glass of water and painkillers on the bedside table preparing for a monster hangover in the morning and pull the duvet over my head.
"Night Liv!" Emmie shouts to me from the sofa.
"Night Emmie." I shout back, closing my eyes.
--------------------
"Get up."
I swat at the pair of hands almost pulling me out of bed.
"Liv get up now I swear." The bed shakes again as if an earthquake has hit. Not than London often gets earthquakes. And they certainly don't have the high pitched voice that Emmie does.
"What!" I sit bolt upright, the room spinning from my wine headache.
"Have you checked your phone?" She's almost buzzing in place.
"No. I was sleeping."
"Well check it! Oh god I'm so excited."
My phone screen is a little too bright as I blink it into focus. The constant pinging from it makes my head hurt as I slowly type in my pin, finally registering the Facebook notifications littering my screen.
"Woah, I have like 4000 notifications." I hold my phone at arms length as it carries on buzzing and pinging at me.
"Yeah you do! You're welcome." She grins at me.
"Emmie. What have you done?"
"I put your breakup cake online" She whispers.
"You did what?"
"I posted it, on that baking group thingy on Facebook. Liv you've gone viral!" My sister squeals as she shakes me with both my shoulders.
"Hashtag heartbreak Bakery is trending!"
"Its WHAT." I flick through the notifications on Emmies post.
'This is amazing!'
'I need this in my life'
'Omg, this is genius'
'HA, I wish I had thought of this'
"Liv, they love you! The phone has been ringing none stop with people wanting breakup cakes."
"You're kidding?" I'm still processing the amount of likes infront of me.
"So, what d'you say? I've got a waiting list of customers ready?" She's staring at me, waiting for an answer.
I hesitate for a moment, my mind whirring, and then I nod.
"Lets do it."
"Lets do it." Emmie replies.
"The Heartbreak Bakery- ending relationships one cake at a time."
_____________________________________________
Authors note.
About HBB
Heartbreak bakery has been an idea that I've toyed with for a long time, the idea of a Baker creating break up cakes and also serving as an agony aunt for each customer absolutely makes me giggle. I wanted something lighthearted and a little funny where each new chapter is completely readable without the rest but still adds to the whole story.
I wanted this to be anti-romance but still romantic, if that makes sense.
HBB is my little bit of fun (because yes, I am writing 2 completely different pieces at the same time like a crazy person.)
So, I'll shut up and let you read,
Welcome to Heartbreak Bakery!
Love,
Beth x
YOU ARE READING
The Heartbreak Bakery
Humor"You did what?" "I posted it, on that baking group thingy on Facebook. Liv you've gone viral!" My sister squeals as she shakes me with both my shoulders. "Hashtag heartbreak Bakery is trending!" ...
