Why Not Me [EXTENDED VERSION]

Simula

Dalilah Armela St. Pierre

“Why not me?” I wearily and bitterly asked myself as I stared at Vini’s text message, each word a painful reminder of what I was not.

    Vinicake: Morning, Dal! Running a little bit late picking you up. Going to swing by Timmies and grab breakfast for Kisses real quick.

With a bit shaky fingers, I typed a reply.

    Ako: How about me? I also want something for breakfast, Vinicake!

I wrote. But instead of sending it, I erased the message and rewrote it. I did not want to sound so pathetic. Besides, I rarely ate breakfast for I never had much of an appetite in the morning.

    Ako: Okay.
   
    Ako: Will wait for you.

    Ako: Ingat sa pagda-drive!

    Ako: Do not forget to wear your seat belt!

I almost sent the I love you phrase, pero mabuti na lamang at napigilan ko ang sarili ko.

I shook off the ugly feelings that ate at me, determined not to let those text messages bring me down. I would not allow it to ruin my day. Instead, I smiled as I stood tall in front of my pink full-length mirror that perfectly matched the walls of my room, feeling a sense of satisfaction at how I looked. Just a bit of blush on and lip tint were all I needed, anyway. Actually, I did not need to put them on because I was already pretty as I was, but since I had American blood, my skin was naturally white, more on the paler side, so I needed to use these to add a bit color to my skin.

Humagikhik ako sa naisip at saka umikot-ikot sa harapan ng salamin, hindi na makapaghintay pa na pumasok sa school.

Today was my first day at Senior High and that meant I was going to see my Vinicake everyday again, although, nagkikita naman kami, parati pa nga dahil magkapitbahay lang kaming dalawa at halos sa kanila na ako tumira. His parents—Tito Davin and Tita Ninaandrea—were perfectly fine with me always being at their house. In fact, they already treated me as their own child. I was soon going to be their daughter in the law, anyway. We already had established that familial bond, but still, I could not seem to get enough of their son.

My Vinicake.

I already missed him and it had only been eight hours since I last saw him. That love of my life who grew up so freaking handsome and tall, so very tall like trees that made me want to be a squirrel on the other hand so that I could always cling onto him. Grabe ang itinangkad ng isang ‘yon ngayon! I could not say that puberty hit him hard, though, kasi bata pa lamang kami ay sobrang guwapo na talaga ng lalaking ‘yon. Hindi siya dumaan sa pagka-pangit, tulad ko na maganda na bata pa lamang kaya naman bagay na bagay talaga kaming dalawa para sa isa’t isa.