CHAPTER 19: SMALL VICTORIES 😜

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Chapter Nineteen

I woke early, aware of Shawn working behind me in the bed, again on his laptop. But I didn’t let on that I was awake, allowing myself to process the events of the night before.
Maybe because it was a fresh day, or perhaps because I wasn’t face-to-face with Sophia, the facts didn’t seem as overwhelming as they had. The truth was, whatever the reality of our relationship, it didn’t change the fact that I was in love with Shawn Carter. And being in love with Shawn Carter put me on his side, whether he was capable of returning my feelings or not. His side meant proving to Sophia that her son was not the unfeeling sociopath that she believed he was, a task that might very well be impossible, but I resolved to give it my best shot. After all, that was the job I’d been hired to do.
And, if I played it right, the work might even be enjoyable.
Determined, I stretched, sat up against the bed frame, and leaned into Shawn. I needed to get him out of his computer and on board.
“Good morning, precious.” He glanced over, his eyes pausing on my bare breasts before he returned his focus to the screen, a twinkle in his eyes. “Did you get enough sleep?”
“I did.” The alarm clock on the nightstand read a few minutes past eight. It was early for me, but I felt rested, adapting somewhat to his traditional sleep schedule.
Shawn still in bed at that time of morning was what was surprising, even awake and working. I’d learned during our get-to-know you game that he usually got up around six. I suspected that this morning he lingered because of my behavior the evening before. He’d sensed my distress and he cared that I felt that way. Didn’t that show capability of love?
Now wasn’t the time to analyze. I filed it away to ponder later.
I skimmed his shoulder with my lips, running my fingers through the soft hair at the base of his neck. “Shawn? Are you going to work all day?”
He stopped typing and rubbed his rough chin against the side of my forehead. “Does my working bother you?”
“Not really. But I was thinking…” I took a deep breath then plunged in. “I didn’t really see your mother yesterday. Shouldn’t we try to spend some time with her today?”
He tensed. “I don’t know if that’s necessary.”
I had guessed he was keeping his mother and I apart on purpose, that he meant to control the animosity between us. While I appreciated the gesture, it was counterproductive. We’d come to the Hamptons because of her. “Isn’t she the person we need to be impressing with our fabulous relationship sham?”
“Being here together is enough.” He straightened his head and returned to his screen, the matter settled in his mind.
But it wasn’t settled for me. I moved to kneel in front of him, demanding his attention. “No, it’s not enough.” He lifted his eyes to meet mine. “I think we should go at her gangbusters. Throw ourselves in her face. You need to ignore your work to make it really convincing, though. Show her that you’re so in love you can’t even concentrate on business. You can only think of me.”
Shawn rubbed a hand over his stubbly face and shook his head.
“What? Not a good idea?”
He shrugged. “It could be a good idea.” He closed the lid of his laptop and placed it on the nightstand. “But do you really want to spend time with my mother? She can be…”
“A total bitch?”
“I was going to say abrasive, but your words fit as well.”
Of course I didn’t want to spend time with Sophia. But I’d realized that she hated me even more than I hated her. Spending time with her would bring more misery to her than to me. “It’s only two more days. I can handle it.”
Shawn reached a hand out to cup my cheek. “You’re pretty incredible, you know?” His eyes wandered down. “Actually, I’m finding it hard to concentrate on anything but your beautiful naked breasts.”
He pulled me in for a kiss, licking his tongue greedily into my mouth.
When his hand circled around my breast, I pulled away. “No, no, no. We can’t stay locked up in here all morning. We have to be downstairs, in the public eye. Or the Sophia eye, anyway. What time is breakfast?”
He sighed. “Eight-thirty.”
“Damn, I’ll have to shower afterward then.” I hopped out of bed and began rummaging for clothes in my suitcase. “Hope no one minds me smelling like sweat and sex.”
Shawn crossed to his own suitcase. “I’m not going to complain.”
As I pulled out an outfit, I remembered the night at the symphony, how Shawn reacted to my hand on his thigh. “I’m warning you right now—I’m playing this full out.” I slipped on some pink panties. “Expect lots of fondling and touching and kissing and such.” A pair of tan shorts followed.
Shawn dressed quickly too, pulling on a pair of jeans, not bothering with underwear. “Thank you for the warning. Though it should probably be me that initiates most of the fondling and touching and kissing and such.” He paused to pull a plain dark t-shirt over his head. “Since it’s my emotions we’re trying to convince her of, not yours.”
I stilled. Did he know my emotions ran deeper? Was he trying to hint that he knew?
No, I was reading too much into his words. I reached behind my back to clasp my bra. “Good point.” I turned to face him. “But can you bring it?”
“Are you challenging me?”
“If it helps.” I pulled a blue sleeveless blouse over my head.
“I don’t need a challenge. I can totally bring it.”
I slipped my feet into flip-flops and swallowed back a laugh, his words sounding so out of character. When I’d composed myself, I met his eyes. “Game on, then?”
“Game on.”
God, he was adorable.
Arriving to an empty dining room, we sauntered into the kitchen where Millie promptly pointed us to the veranda before hustling to get together plates and utensils for us. Shawn took my hand, lacing his fingers through mine and squeezed, a silent reassurance before we stepped onto the battlefield. Then he pulled me outside through the open French doors where we found Kelly, Lebron, Jack and Sophia already dining on eggs, potato casserole, ham and fruit cups. Chandler, I guessed, was sleeping in after his late night adventure. He was a teenager, hardly expected to be out of bed before noon.
Sophia noticed us first. “Well, well. They managed to leave the bedroom.”
Kelly’s expression turned puzzled then embarrassed when she saw us. “Mom!”
Lebron mumbled a half-hearted greeting, consumed with whatever he was reading on his phone. Jack nodded at us, adding a wink, then sat back in his chair as if about to watch something entertaining.
Sophia set her fork down and dabbed at her lips with a napkin. “It’s a fair observation. I didn’t expect them down this early.” Her eyes bore into me. “Especially when Beyoncé was up so late swimming.” It was meant to be a reminder. I’m in control. You’re insignificant.
I fidgeted as Shawn stole a glance at me, probably piecing together that my mood the night before had been because of Sophia. She knew I hadn’t told him about our conversation—if I had, Shawn and I would have likely been out the door first thing that morning. She had gambled, and had won the hand. But I still had cards to play.
I kept my features even and lifted my chin slightly. “Shawn and I wanted to make sure we got to spend some time with you.” My words spread like honey, but underneath they were hot pepper. “Are you feeling up to it? I mean, you were up late, too. And you had that nasty headache.”
“You’d have fewer of those if you’d lay off the sauce,” Jack jabbed.
Sophia ignored her husband. “I am feeling better. Thank you.” Her stiff tone belied her insincerity. “And I never turn down time with my son. Please, join us.”
On cue, Millie set two more place settings and Shawn pulled two chairs closer to the table, Kelly and Lebron already occupying the loveseat. By the time I sat, spread a napkin on my lap, and accepted a mug of coffee from Shawn, a plate of hot breakfast had been placed in front of me.
We ate in silence for several minutes, the usual noises of dining the only sound. Shawn and I exchanged several looks, both of us eager to demonstrate our supposed romance, neither of us knowing how. Under the table, my knee bounced with anxiety until he stilled it with a firm hand. He kept his hand there, resting while we continued eating, my skin tingling under his touch.
I closed my eyes and drew in a breath. The smell of summer flowers wafted through the air, the breeze warm and pleasant. It was a gorgeous day in a beautiful setting, and the atmosphere relaxed me enough to break the quiet. “So.” I waited until all eyes were on me to continue. “What’s on the agenda for the day?”
Kelly beamed as if grateful for conversation. “Lebron and I want to hit the beach. Don’t we, sweetie?”
“Uh huh,” Lebron mumbled without looking up from his phone. What was with the men around here? Always sucked into their electronics.
If Kelly minded Lebron’s distraction, she didn’t show it. “It’s perfect weather for it. We can relax and soak up some rays. Millie could pack us a lunch. Want to come with us?”
I’d been in the Carter estate for more than a day and still hadn’t ventured down to the ocean at the edge of the Hampton property. The beach sounded wonderful. “I’m up for it. Shawn?”
Shawn grinned a little too wide, but I was probably the only one who noticed. “Wherever you are, baby, I’m there.”
I surprised myself by not cringing at his choice of endearment.
“Shawn, you’ll get sand in your computer,” Sophia said. “And we don’t get great Wi-Fi down there. Wouldn’t you rather work up here?” Her assumption that Shawn would spend the day working fit right into my scheme. Now, would he follow through with his part? He’d never quite agreed.
He set his fork down and looked directly at Sophia. “Actually, I’m not doing any work today, Mother.” He moved his hand from under the table to my neck, stroking gently under my hair. “I promised Bey I’d give her my full attention for the rest of our trip.”
I would have preferred that he’d played it like he couldn’t even concentrate on work because of me, but, besides his version being much more believable, his use of my nickname was perfect. Even Lebron looked up long enough to exchange a surprised look with his wife.
Sophia’s reaction, though, was priceless. She gaped.
As much as I would have liked to take in every second of Sophia’s shock, I slid my focus to Shawn. “Thank you, Shawn.” My gratitude extended deeper than the superficial show we were performing. I appreciated that he’d listened to my suggestions, that he heard me and then acted on it.
Shawn’s deep brown eyes erased our spectators from my view. “It’s nothing,” he murmured. “You’re worth it.” Was his response as genuine as my thanks? Or was he just an excellent actor?
“Mom? Join us at the beach?” Kelly practically bounced in her seat, the idea of a family outing right up her alley.
Sophia’s expression was unchanging, her voice level. “Sure. Why not?”
Jack guffawed. “Sophia spending the day in the sand? This I have to see.”
Again Sophia ignored her husband, but Jack seemed pleased all the same.
“Lebron,” Kelly elbowed her husband in the ribs. “Go wake up Chandler. We can take the Jet Ski out.”
“Uh, okay.” Lebron stuffed his phone into the pocket of his khaki carpenter pants, crumpled his napkin into a ball, and stood, appearing grateful for the excuse to leave. It occurred to me that I’d never seen him around Sophia. Perhaps he had buried himself in his phone to avoid interacting with her. Smart.
Kelly turned her attention to Jack. “And Dad, if you wear a thong again, I swear to God…”
“Fine.” He leaned back in his chair. “I’ll dress like an old man. But only for you, ladybug.”
While her family conversed around her, Sophia sat solemnly, her eyes calculating. At least, that’s how I interpreted her narrow gaze, fixed at nothing in particular on the table in front of her, her hands laced together.
“Shawn,” she said finally. “The Careys are arriving at their Hampton house this evening.”
“That’s nice.” He poked at what was left of his ham with his fork, his features even. “Why are you telling me this?”
I put my hand on Shawn’s knee, bracing myself for where this conversation was going.
“Mariah’s coming, too.” And there it was—Sophia’s bombshell. “I know how long it’s been since you’ve gotten to spend time together so I invited her for brunch tomorrow.”
Shawn’s face was steel, his jaw tight as he set his fork down with a noisy clink.
I imagined my heart plummeting through my chest, landing in my stomach with the same clink. Mariah was a weak spot for me. She fueled my jealousy in ways that were absurd and unreasonable but real nonetheless. To keep from betraying my emotions, I bit my lip. Hard.
Kelly’s face went red. “Mom! Why would you do that?”
Jack, who had rolled his eyes at Sophia’s announcement, now leaned toward his daughter, his arm resting on his knee. “Honestly, Kelly, does this type of behavior from your mother surprise you?”
Sophia’s eyebrows raised in mock innocence. “What did I do?”
Kelly groaned in response. Shawn remained silent, anger rolling off his body in waves.
Sophia either delighted in her son’s rage or didn’t recognize it. “Anyway, we’ve been talking about redecorating the main rooms. I figured this was a great opportunity for her to show us some ideas while catching up with her dear friend.” She turned up her sickening sweet smile. “Beyoncé, you’ve met Mariah. Did you know that she did all the decorating for Shawn’s offices and penthouse?”
I glanced at Shawn who was barely containing his fury. “I did.”
I took a sip of coffee, preparing my next words. The loft above his office wasn’t where Shawn lived. I’d never been to his penthouse, but, of course, Sophia assumed I had. Anything I said I’d have to phrase carefully. “Mariah’s got excellent taste. I think she managed to capture Shawn’s style quite well in both his living and working space.” It was true of his office and the loft, anyway. Hopefully it held about his penthouse.
“Which is your favorite room?”
“Sophia.” Jack’s tone was a warning.
Shawn tensed beside me, and I shoveled a mouthful of eggs into my mouth to stall. He’d hinted that he never took women to his penthouse, which had seemed like a good safety net for me—I couldn’t stalk a man’s house if I didn’t know where it was. But did Sophia know he didn’t take women there? Was she trying to trap me or was I being paranoid?
And underneath the concern of responding correctly was the punch of jealousy: Mariah had been in Shawn’s private home. She had to have been if she had done the interior design.
I swallowed the bitter sting with my eggs and gave Sophia the only answer I could, lame as it was. “Oh, I love all of it. I could never pick one room.”
Shawn took my hand that still rested on his knee and laced it in his. “Didn’t you tell me you liked the library the best?”
Thank god. He’d cooled himself enough to throw me a line.
“Only because it has books.” Of course I’d love the library, being an avid reader.
Sophia’s smile was smug. “He barely has any books at all.”
Leave it to Shawn to have a library with no books.
He cleared his throat. “Actually, we’re working on improving that.” I exchanged a glance with him that I hoped expressed my thanks. “Beyoncé loves books so I’ve purchased quite a few since we’ve met. You haven’t been there in a while, Mother.”
“I haven’t been invited.”
“Since when has that stopped you?” This time Jack’s comment earned a scowl from his wife. He answered it with an innocent shrug.
Sophia turned her attention back to me. “Are you officially living together then?”
“No,” I said as Shawn said, “Yes.”
I met his eyes, one brow raised. Saying I lived with him was a pretty big lie not to discuss with me first. Talk about bringing it on.
His eyes pierced into mine. “But you practically are. Once your lease is up, next month. Or have you changed your mind?”
A bubble of uncontrolled excitement rose in my chest. For a moment, it felt real, like he was asking me to be that in his life.
It wasn’t real, though. What it was instead was an excellent move on Shawn’s part, one sure to rile up his mother. I couldn’t wreck it.
I swallowed then smiled shyly. “No, I haven’t changed my mind. I just didn’t realize we were telling your family, yet.”
“Hell, I’m telling everyone.” He practically beamed. God, he was good. “It’s the best thing to ever happen to me.”
Jack nodded, a twinkle in his eye. “I think it’s terrific.”
Sophia turned to her spouse and frowned. “Why are you here anyway, Jack? You haven’t vacationed with us in years.”
“Kelly invited me.”
“Shawn was coming and it’s been so long since we’ve had the whole family together.” Kelly’s intentions were the best. How had she lived in this family all her life without realizing it could never be the Brady Bunch she longed for? I’d known them all for only a minute and recognized dysfunction like a big neon sign.
Then, speaking of dysfunction, Kelly asked, “What’s your family like, Bey? Are you close?”
I took a deep breath. “Actually, no. My parents passed away in a drunk driving accident when I was sixteen. My brother looked after me, but now we’re…” I hadn’t said the word aloud to anyone yet, but it was honest and it needed to be said. “Estranged.”
“Oh, no!” Kelly clasped her hand to her mouth.
Shawn stayed silent, but he raised a brow as he unlaced his hand from mine and rubbed it soothingly across my back. He knew Idris had been trying to contact me, probably realized the estrangement was a recent thing.
Jack shook his head slowly and tsked. “I hope that drunk was held accountable, at least.” I swear he looked at Sophia when he said the word “drunk.”
It was an opportunity to lie. I had before when people had asked, but I wanted to say it now, whether to shock or gain sympathy, I didn’t know. “You could say so. The drunk was my father. He was a full-time alcoholic, actually.”
“I’m sorry,” Jack said softly. “I didn’t realize.”
My eyes glistened. “It was years ago. I’ve learned to accept it.”
I couldn’t look at Shawn. I hadn’t told him anything about my parents, but if he had looked hard enough to find my restraining orders, he likely already knew. I couldn’t bear to see him look at me with pity.
“Less than ideal pasts,” Shawn said, loud enough for everyone to hear, but gentle all the same, his fingers continuing their sweeping pattern across my back. “It’s something Beyoncé and I have in common.”
I turned to him and found his gaze absent of pity. Instead it held understanding. More and more I realized that I was special to him because of this unique recognition he saw in me. Were we really that alike?
“I don’t like what you’re implying,” Sophia snarled.
“I’m not implying anything, Mother. I’m stating an unattractive fact.”
“Keep your unattractive facts to yourself for the rest of the day, will you?” The fury in her tone was unmasked. She scooted her chair out and stood from the table. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to prepare for our beach outing.”
With every card we’d played throughout the meal, Shawn had wounded her with one brief comment, the evidence plain in her expression.
I snuck a victory smile at Shawn, which he returned with equal delight shining in his eyes. This round had gone to us.

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