Note- I don't ship these two but I thought they had such an interesting dynamic and they were really cute as friends
Blair walked down the familiar hall, enamored just by the smell of smoke that still lingered. It was muscle memory by now, she could've done it with her eyes closed, she'd used to walk this way all the time. But that had been back when she'd known where she was going, back when she'd been sure of her welcome, back when home had been Nate Archibald, simple as that-before they'd grown up, before they stopped just fitting. Still, here she was, when she lost everything else his door was the only one she remembered to turn to. Muscle memory and all. Growing up when she'd feel neglected by her mother or get into a fight with Serena this was where she'd run. And now, even though her problems had grown up, she was still here, running like Nate Archibald could still save her from her broken marriage with Louis and her toxic, off-and-on love with Chuck.
He was warm and welcoming just like always. Unlike all the other men in her life Nate was pure good-simple and sweet and nice. He smelled like the same cologne he always had and he gave her a hug and said hey and didn't ask her why she'd showed up now after all the years that had gone by because it didn't matter. She was here now and she was his friend and that's all there was to it. He wasn't bitter for the past or hopeful for the future. He just held her and offered her a beer and tried to explain baseball.
It was so beautifully easy, she thought. If only she didn't belong with Chuck, if only he didn't belong with Serena, if only they'd never grown up from those smiling kids with the whole world at their feet. They'd both reached their peaks long ago, prom king and queen, the perfect fairytale that had ended nowhere close to ever after. But here on his couch watching stupid baseball it was so easy to pretend-they could almost see their future, the glint of the ring that had never made it to her finger, the applause for a day that would never come, the perfect lives they'd never live. Because now they were just two washed-up, half-drunk college dropouts, nursing broken hearts for the flighty, fleeting heartbreakers they'd fallen for instead, clinging to the last remnants of the simple past they'd shared. For a moment she longed for the life they'd never have, the society wedding, the two beautiful kids, the white picket fence. She'd used to rebel against that future, so terrified of boredom, so desperate for a Chuck Bass to spice up her life, but after all she'd been through suddenly the easy way out didn't seem so bad.She still loved Chuck, of course she did, in some deep, twisted way, tangled into her soul, inescapable, eternal. She'd always love him, in whatever way she did. But that love hurt and this didn't and Nate's touch was gentle and maybe he could put her back together somehow the same way Chuck had torn her apart. Maybe if she let his soft, forgiving hands run over every crevice of her she'd somehow be redeemed, regress back to that same innocent teenager he'd used to touch with his fumbling sweetness. She wished he would touch her, let his essential goodness seep into her, turn her back into someone she recognized. She'd wandered so far, all the way to Brooklyn, but now all she wanted was to be found again.
He was grinning about some point that had been scored and it was so easy to make him happy. She smiled with him, cheered along for everyone and he laughed at her and she felt light and free, like she knew just how to be around him. It was like falling back into an old pattern, doing a dance she'd done a thousand times before. She pressed her lips to his gently, holding him as close as she could, trying desperately to make them what they'd been once, find herself again somewhere reflected in his eyes.
He kissed her back gently, running his hands through her hair, exploring every inch of her with practiced hands that remembered just what she liked. He whispered to her as his hands roamed her body, softly calling her beautiful, asking if all of it was okay, with that same boyish, endearing innocence she'd always loved. She ached to be touched by him, possessed, drawn back in. He was gentle and sweet and everything felt good and she didn't have to think and she knew all the answers and for a little while it was perfect. But when they opened their eyes they were staring a stranger, and they'd grown up, no matter how far they ran from it. Her body was hers to give as she pleased, but her heart hadn't been hers for a while now. They both had to face the day when the morning light crept in, harsh and unforgiving, exposing all their little flaws. In the end the sweetness of the past was too far gone to build a future on.
So she left the same way she came, because after all this time that was muscle memory too.
