Sabi nila kapag mahal mo ang isang tao ipaglaban mo. Pero kapag hindi mo ba ipinaglaban ang isang tao, ibig sabihin ba non hindi mo na sya mahal?
Hindi ba pwedeng dahil sa sobrang pagmamahal mo na yun, yun yung reason kung bakit hindi mo sya nagawang ipagblaban.
"I'm giving up not because I don't love you anymore, but because I actually do."
Third year highschoool ako noon at dun ko talaga masasabing first time kong naranasan yung ganoong bagay sa tanang buhay ko. Oo, let's say na I had a few crushes, pampakalig lang kasi ang pangit naman kung ihi nalang ang nagpapakilig sakin.
Hello third year life na ko, new people, new chances, new friends. At syempre, bagong crush. Aga kong humarot, diba?
I met a guy, we became friends. New student sya non tapos crush ng bayan, ang daming nagsasabi na ang pogi ng new student na yun so nacurious ako. Syempre ayaw ko mahuli sa uso kaya nakipagfriends ako sakanya. And may I tell you, we became friends in an unexpected way, dahil sa kakapalan ng mukha ko.
Turns out snob pala sya sa iba at dahil makapal ang mukha ko at pursigido ako, naging close friends talaga kami. And it goes on and on hanggang sa nagkakausap na kami palagi and other stuffs pa until nagkacrush na ko sakanya.
Fast forward, naging super close kami and ako yung kauna-unahang babae na nakaclose nya sa school namin. But I'm not that in to him. Yung crush ko sakanya, saktong level lang, pampakilig lang.
Everyone knows na may crush ako sakanya, some even assumed na mahal ko na sya.
I wasn't really gonna get out sa crushzoned ko sakanya if it wasn't for a him.
And here comes the new guy. Well, he isn't really a "new" guy. Friend ko naman talaga sya and matagal na syang nag-aaral sa school na yun. First year highschool pa lang sya dito na sya nag-aaral.
Fun fact: I liked him back then. As in crush na crush ko sya nung grade 6 pa ako.
I didn't know when it really started. He knew na may iba akong gusto and yet he continued to do those stuffs. Stuffs that made me.... I don't wanna call it "love" 'cause I know it's not really love.
Hindi ko talaga alam kung kailan nag start yung ganoong actions nya towards me pero kahit deadmahin ko di ko maiwasang pansinin.
Yung small efforts nya, yung pagstastart nya ng conversation, yung pag sunod nya sa gusto ko kahit maliit na bagay lang yun, yung effort na pagmemorize nya sa paborito kong kanta kahit ayaw nya non, yung panglibre nya sakin eh ubod sya ng kuripot.
Little things.
It's the little things that counts.
It's the little things that made me like him.
It was getting ovious that people were pushing me to him. Inuungkat ng mga kakilala nya yung feelings ko sakanya dati, they asked me stuffs like gusto ko ba sya or may chance daw ba, and our common friends knows who he likes except for me.
Nagstart na kong maguluhan. Sa pinapakita nya, sa sinasabi ng iba. I asked him kung sino ba crush nya and he said someone else's name. I didn't get hurt. I was even trying to help him get her.
But weeks passed and nothing has changed. Ganon pa rin sya sakin. Pati yung friends namin ganon pa rin. Nagkagirlfriend na yung dati kong crush, but it's okay, I like the girl for him naman eh.
Everyone thought na I was devastated, even him. May mga times na kapag super bad trip ako at kita na yung black aura sa paligid ko at lahat ng tao takot na kausapin ako, he would still try to talk to me.
