In the wind and biting cold I stand, watching the kid in front of me in formation shaking like a leaf in a thunderstorm. He couldn't be more than 25 years old, I thought to myself. How long we've stood out here I couldn't say, but when we formed up there was still daylight. Now we remain standing in the pitch black darkness of a rainy October night.
Suddenly I see flashlights heading toward the direction of our massive formation in front of us. They walk around us, observing us as the do so.
"Alright men!" One of the unidentified people with flashlights speaks loud enough to be heard by all. "All of you know what you signed up for. What you don't know is how you'll get there and I can guarantee you that. Currently I have 400 hundred of you in front of you. Only 4 will remain after the next 18 weeks. Just remember this is just selection, the actual training gets harder. Also remember that none of you were selected because you are the best in your originating units, your physical abilities, or anything else related. This selection process tests your mental strength and that's why we picked you. If we needed top dogs built like brick shit houses we would have picked them. Any questions so far?"
Nobody spoke. The formation, now surrounded by flashlights, remained so silent that outside of the wind, you might have been able to hear a pin drop.
"Good. Every 4 hours we will give you a new code word. If at anytime you wish to quit and go back to your originating units, all you have to do is yell that code word. Twice a week you will be mentally evaluated and if it is determined that you are not mentally fit to continue you will be returned to your originating units. Those are the only two ways you can leave. Once again any questions?"
As before the formation remained silent.
"Good. Selection begins now. You will all be blind folded. Code word is Twinkie."
With that the swarm of flashlights descended upon us. Suddenly a blindfold is tied tightly on me and all I can see is black. The air grows tense as the movement stops and the wind once again becomes the only thing that can be heard.
We stand for what feels like an eternity before I hear a voice in front of me.
"Twinkie!" The voice calls out and I can only assume from the direction of the voice that it was the kid in front of me. Movement can be heard in front of me as the first quitter is removed from formation. I knew that he wouldn't last much longer from the way he had already been shaking from the cold.
Another eternity later and a gunshot could be heard in the distance. It couldn't have been more than a small caliber handgun but once again the codeword was yelled immediately following it. More gunshots and more quitters came.
The gunshots continued in intervals, first a few here and there, soon becoming an absolute swarm of gunfire prompting more and more people to quit. I held my ground choosing instead to let my mind focus on something else other than the gunfire. Eventually I had tuned it out for so long that I hadn't even realized that it had stopped. The silence had once again fallen over the formation.
"Twinkie! Twinkie!!" Another yelling of the codeword, this time sounding more panicked than any before it.
I couldn't hear anymore gunshots, however, and as much as I tried I couldn't figure out what might have been going on to cause this. Another panicked yelling of the word came, this time closer than the other. My wondering ceased quickly once I had an answer for what was going on. Violently and quicky I was picked up and thrown over somebody's shoulder. The sudden and jarring movement had the word almost spilling out of my mouth, but I kept my lips sealed tight.
How far I was carried I'll never know but soon I head the sound of rushing water. Whoever was carrying me didn't hesitate to throw me into the water, still blindfolded. I sank quickly to the bottom and struggled to find bearings to get back up to the top in the quickly moving current. Finally breaking the water I choked for air, but could only get a little bit before the water forced me back down.
I smashed into a rock, taking what little air I had out of me. The assumed river carried me on, struggling the whole way until I went over the edge of a waterfall. I fell for what felt like forever, wondering when I would hit the bottom again, almost letting the word escape. I then crashed down into the water again sinking once again. Once I managed to reach the top again I head something splash into the water beside me. Feeling around the ice cold water I found the culprit, a rope that must have been thrown for me to grab.
I held onto the rope for a moment expecting to feel the pull of somebody bringing me back towards dry land. After not feeling the expected pull, I started to pull myself along the rope until I found sand underneath me. Once I reached the edge again, I couldn't hear anybody and realized the rope continued. Not wanting to let go and lose my bearings again, I held onto the rope as I stood up and walked along it, letting it guide me.
After cold river that had beaten every bit of energy out of me, I found difficulty in walking, but kept moving. Soon another hail of gunfire descended upon me and I hit the ground, still refusing to let go of the rope as it was my only way through this mess. I kept pulling myself along until the gunfire was a good distance away. I decided to stop and catch my breath for a second. Silence once again fell upon me and the only sound I could hear was my own labored breathing.
"Just say the word and you're done." The voice that came from nowhere uttered the words right next to my ear.
It almost gave me a heart attack with how unexpected it was. As I would not let myself quit on the first night in, the only thing I could do was keep going. I stood back up and once again let the rope guide me.
I only walked for another short distance, before I was stopped. My blindfold was removed by somebody who led me to a pickup truck. I was about to get into the cab of the truck and was stopped, instead being gestured towards the bed of the truck where I climbed in and waited. After a while more people from the formation were loaded in until the truck was full and we took off.
Driving through the woods for only a short time we soon came up to a brick building. Once there we started another formation. More truckloads of people were brought over through what must have been an hour. Eventually we were once again surrounded by flashlights.
"Out of 400," the same voice from earlier spoke, "325 of you remain. I must say I am impressed. Usually we get more than that to quit on the first night. Don't worry though, only four of you can remain by the end. Please form a straight line and head inside. You will be directed from there."
Doing as we were told we filed inside. Once I was inside the door, a blond woman in a black uniform walked up to me. She looked over me for a second, something not adding up in her mind.
"As much as they only care about your mind, you're still a little smaller than the people that usually come through here. Anyway, follow me."
I did as I was told and followed. Up a couple flights of stairs and down a hallway we went. We stopped at a door numbered 318.
"These are your quarters for the duration of the training. If you decide to remain, you'll come back here every night. Lights out is up to you and you can take a shower if you want to. An alarm will wake you up at 0330 and breakfast is at 0400. Make sure you change out of the army's uniform and into ours by that time. New code word is Moonstone. Goodnight."
With that she handed me a key and disappeared down the hallway. I unlocked the door and walked in, relocking it and closing it behind me. The room was small and dismal, better suited as a broom closet. The clock on the wall read 0130. Noting the time I opted just to change and go to sleep for the 2 hours I had.
