Chapter 1
Jack sat with his head in his hands.
He did this more often now that Tosh and Owen were dead. Dead because of him.
Gwen could tell him otherwise, but he knew. He knew it was his fault.
Jack knew that one way or another, Gwen and Ianto would end up the same way. Dead for Torchwood. Dead for humanity.
Dead for him. Because of him. Sometimes he wondered if it was all worth it in the end...
He would outlive them anyway. Sometimes he wondered why he bothered at living anyway. Why not just curl up in a corner and try not to think?
The Doctor. The Doctor wouldn't want him to curl up.
He'd end up going crazy anyhow, so that option was out.
The Doctor. Damn, why hadn't he stayed with him? Why had he left the TARDIS?
He knew. That damned team. They'd never leave him.
Well, they'd leave him, but they'd leave scars as well. Just like the ones he bore now, after Henry and Louis, Diane and Peter, Tosh and Owen...
"I'm gone for the night!" Gwen called, breaking him out of his reverie. He didn't bother responding. Both of the remaining team members knew he had these moods sometimes.
The remaining team members...
"We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell." Jack's head whipped up. Ianto stood in the doorway to his office.
"Oscar Wilde." Ianto nodded wordlessly, seeing the scream Jack didn't know he was holding in.
"You know, I met Oscar Wilde once. That quote never made sense to me-he was always such a giving, happy person." Jack voice wavers, and he hopes Ianto doesn't hear it. He does.
They freeze into silence, the sound of Jack's pain filling the moment.
