Ultra Instinct Employee

Hell's Flatmate

The microwave hummed as it lowly glowed, spinning a bowl of ramen at an extremely slow centrifugal force. Clay watched contently, trying to ignore everyone who was watching him.
"You know... you guys can leave now."
"Are you kidding!?" Exclaimed Vidiri. "I still have so much to learn!"
"You said we'd hang out today!" Hataraku complained.
"Actually, you can stay," Clay told Hataraku, "But why are YOU here?"
He glanced over at Ibexa, who was already laying on his bed, using all his bread and ketchup to make ketchup sandwiches.
"I don't wanna go back to hell... it's bright up here." She smiled innocently, spilling the ketchup on herself and the bed.
"Well you can't stay here—"
"Did I mention I can pay rent?"
"..."
The next thing anybody knew, Hataraku and his shadow clones were helping Ibexa move her stuff into Clay's apartment.
"Wait— so SHE gets to stay but I don't? Vidiri asked, admittedly insulted.
"SHE has rent, Vidiri."
Vidiri glanced at Ibexa, who quickly stuck her tongue out at her.
Two of Hataraku's clones carefully started trekking a futon up the stairs and into Ibexa's new room. However, one of them dropped it on their foot coming up the stairs, and they both slid down with the couch. Eventually they got it upstairs and inside, though.

"You have absolutely zero furniture, dude," Ibexa looked around the apartment now that she had moved all of a sofa bed and a nightstand with a flower on it into the apartment.
"Your furniture is literally still superheated."
The two had to go out and buy bags of ice thanks to the sheer temperature held within Ibexa's obsidian table, and the couch wasn't much better. The ice was already melted, so they just had bags of lukewarm water lying around.
"Hey, don't knock my funiture!" Ibexa smiled. "At least that mouse likes it."
"MOUSE?"
Clay looked to the corner of the room, and there was, indeed, a mouse. Well, there WAS a mouse. Clay literally sucker punched it to the moon. Ibexa watched in disbelief.
"What the fu—"
"Rule one roomie— never let a mouse into the apartment."
"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?"
"Just don't let a mouse into the apartment. Or else you'll be next."
Clay's voice wasn't the deadpan delivery it usually was. He was serious. Ibexa gulped as he stared her down.
"Do you understand?" Clay asked.
"Y-YES, DEAR GOD YES!" Ibexa ran for the nearest door to try and give Clay some space.
"Closet? Cool. See if you can find my old gaming stuff.
~~~
The next day was... quite the experience for all parties involved. Knocking interrupted Clay's sleep.
"Ugh... it's like eleven in the morning... who's even up this early?"
Clay opened the door with a scowl, but immediately fixed his face when he saw who was here.
"Shadow...?"
Yup, there he was. Clay's best friend since grade school.
"Shadow!!!"
Shadow and Clay hugged eachother tightly.
"Dude, I thought you were in Compton or something!"
"I was," Shadow chuckled. "Until the leaders of the Muds and the Drips both got they asses beat."
"Wow, that's so weird, I guess their health just disappeared," Clay joked, opening the door wider. "Come in, buddy. We gotta catch up.
"Holy... we most certainly do— apparently I missed a lot."
Clay looked into the apartment to see Ibexa was watching some trashy housewives show. That would be fine, save for the fact that she hadn't bothered to dress herself more than underwear.
"Oh hey, a black guy!" Ibexa quipped.
"So you out here getting we demons now?" Shadow said, noticing the horns. "Okay, I see you!"
"Wuh— no, not at all!" This, reader, is extremely rare footage of Clay being nervous.
"Aww, no need to be shy, babe." Ibexa decided to play along. She walked up to clay and wrapped her arm around him, using her free hand to drag her finger along his chest. Is there a word for that? Either way I've always thought it was a bit of a quirky thing to do. One thing's for certain though— Clay had no idea what was happening!

"So you met some paintbrush chick and now she comes to your house to train?"
"Yeah. I tried telling her to screw off plenty times, but she's too eager to learn. Can't shake her."
"Oh, that reminds me! You still hang out with that one kid, with all the jobs?"
"Hataraku?"
"Yeah, that's it! Asian name havin' ass."
"Yeah. He's still my favorite person here, I guess. The only one I can actually stand."
"Rude," Ibexa smiled at Clay, thankfully fully clothed this time.
"Anyways," Clay continued. "That reminds me— where ya staying?"
"Oh, bro that's the best part! I'm like two floors up!"
Clay... actually smiled. Today was a day for rare sights.
"Funny... it looks like we'll be reassembling the four. Just gotta find Mr. UFO."
"Mr UFO?" Asked Ibexa. "Is he an alien or something?" She laughed.
"Yeah," said Clay. Ibexa stopped laughing immediately. "It's really insteresting how we met actually, see— oop, hang on."
Clay's phone had rang. It was his boss, Lester. Oh boy.
"Hello?"
"Clay, I need you to come in today! Like, immediately!"
"Dude. It's Tisha B'av. No."
"You're Jewish?" Asked Ibexa. Clay muted his phone.
"Pffft, no. I just told them that to get paid holidays."
"Do Jewish people even take that one off?" Asked Shadow.
"Huh? I dunno. All I did was set a bunch of reminders on my phone. I actually did that with every holiday from every religion. I even get Valentine's Day off at this point."
"All that money and you still broke as hell," Shadow shook his head, looking around the same studio apartment Clay had lived in for years.
"Clay!" His boss shouted into the phone so hard it unmuted itself and set itself to speaker.
"Look, I'll pay you quadruple double overtime— THAT'S EIGHT TIMES PAY!"
"Lester, calm down." Clay sighed. "What could be so important that you're willing to pay me $41.20 an hour?"
One timeskip later and Lester was standing with Clay and his friends.
"THAT."
And there stood the most powerful man in the entire minimum wage job industry— Jack Box.

"So... do you regularly bring people places before finishing your sentences?" Asked Shadow.