Tears From My Broken Past

Chapter 1

Chapter 1- note- all the parts that are mainly italics are her dreams/memories

Eight years is a long time to hold a grudge.  Right?  I mean, it's human nature to forgive.  "Forgiven, not forgotten" and all that crap.  But what if the people did something unspeakable to you?  If so, is it then justified to never foget?  And never forgive?  If some did something to you that forever altered your life; if the people that you place your trust in betray you, can you hold a grudge for a life time?  For eternity? 

I know that I can.  Although the fates forbid me from rembering most of my life, I do have two very strong memories: the day my parents sold me and sealed my fate, and the day that I escaped, and took my life in my own hands.  Since then the gods have abandoned me, and I'm forced to fend for myself, a lone wolf in a world of hunters with other-worldly guidence. 

"Vesper.  What time is it?" a voice said sleepily from the ground beside me.  I stooped down, my eyes softening as I saw the face that was talking. 

"Go back to sleep, Aaron" I whispered.  The boy on the ground rolled over, trying to get comfortable on the thin sheet of hay that i placed over the stone floor.  I felt sorry for him, for dragging him and the others into this.  I tore my eyes away from his perfect face, and surveyed the others that lay curled up on their piles of hay.  I saw Corbin and Ravenna, the twins, their long black hair tangled together as they lay back to back, trying to keep eachother warm.  My eyes paused again at Fox, who was curled tightly into a ball, the only way of distinguishing him from the shadows was his mop of red hair.  Gavan, with his pale skin and hair, Sevenja, with all her features matching Gavan's, and Beowulf... My eyes paused.  Beowulf blended in completly with the shadows; the only way I could see him was his golden eyes, which reflected the small candle-flame. 

I walked over to him, my feet unwilling to leave the side of Aaron's sleeping form.  "Why are you still awake?" I whispered, ever wary of him. 

Sensing my hesitation, he smiled, shook his head, and looked off into the corner.  "You've never trusted me, Vesper, have you?"  Seeing me shake his head, he continued.  "I'm on your side.  And you're stuck with me.  I can be a great person when I'm on your side, but I can be a bitch when you make me go against you.  So, pick one.  What do you want?" 

I thought back, trying to recall all the memories that he was in.  They came slowly, gritty, as if I had archived them in a far-off, fuzzy land. All I could remember was his smile... the wolfish grin that always stuck in my mind. 

"You can't remember anything, can you?" he asked, his voice softening slightly.  As if noticing it, he plastered the grin back on his face.  I stared of at the corner he had been previously looking at, desperate to not look at him...

"I thought so," he continued, seeing that I wouldnt answer.  I closed my eyes, gathering my thoughts for a minute, trying to remember my past.  A tear escaped my closed lid; it was neither the first, nor the last, tear that I would shed over my forgotten past. 

"It's not your fault that you've forgotten," Beowulf said, softening again.  "It's the liquid."  He paused, to let that sink in. 

"Is that how you're memory came back?" I asked, feeling the tear as it slowly slid down my face. 

"Who said mine came back?" he asked.  He took my face in his hand, and turned it towards his.  I recoiled slightly; everything screamed at me that this is wrong, this isn't supposed to happen.  Not now, not ever.  "Vesper, you're not alone here.  The things that those people did to you, they did to us.  We're just as bad as you are.  However, the others, they look to you as their leader.  It's time you started acting like one."

I stood up suddenly, and without another look back, walked over to Aaron.  I sat down, and slowly lowered myself to the floor, all-to-aware of my aching bones and muscles.  I felt him move, just a little, but it was a movement all the same.  A movement caused by me.  Something that I did. 

I fell into a painless sleep, the first sleep that had come to me in a long time.  And, as per usual, I dreamt of escape. 

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"Vesper, come with me.  Please." The voice plead, but I was not to be fooled by the stern face that spoke it.

"That's not my name," I replied, my young voice quivering.  "My name's Molly."

"Vesper, come here to me.  I have a surprise for you." 

He has a surprise for me,I thought.  He can't be that bad. I tottered over to him, still unstable on my young legs.  I was curious as to what he was talking about.  I walked through the small gate in the iron bars that was the cage  prision that I was held in.  However, to me it wasn't a prision.  It was my home. 

"What is it?" I asked, finally rounding the corner. 

"This," the man said as he grabbed my mouth with a rough hand, and pulled me close with the other.  I felt a rope being wrapped around my wrists, and I struggled, not knowing what was going to happen; however I knew that I didn't want it. 

"If you don't struggle, this will hurt less," the man said in my ear.  I felt another needle pierce my skin, except this one hurt less.  However, I could tell that I would still leave a mark in the crux of my elbow, just like all the other ones. 

I felt myself slipping away from the world, and for once I welcomed it.  Please let this be the last time I ever sleep...