deja vu~ miraculous

15 | motivation

Adrien
"C'mon Adrien you've been a couch camembert for the past week now you need to get up eventually." Plagg said, trying to pull Adrien out of bed.

"I can't Plagg, I'm not ready to face him." He said turning around and burying his head in his pillow.

He had heard something he really wasn't supposed to.

His father was Shadowmoth and he hadn't had the courage to tell Ladybug yet. The guilt was eating him up inside. He knew how angry she would be when she found out he hadn't told her- but he just wasn't ready to face that.

"Your dad might not be Shadowmoth Adrien- maybe Shadowmoth's evil lair just connects to a tunnel into your house."

"But Lila was there. And she was at the dinner. There's no other explanation."

He wanted to cry and scream and hurt someone. He had never been a violent person, but at the moment he was so angry he scared himself. He was so angry he was afraid that he would hurt someone. He punched his wall a few times, chipping the paint slightly. Over the last week that spot had been his punching bag. Sometimes he didn't stop hitting it until his knuckles bled.

He forced himself not to go to school, even though it served as his escape. He couldn't risk accidentally losing it and potentially hurting someone. He wouldn't let himself.

So instead, he rotted away in his room until his patrols where he could free himself as Chat Noir.

"Adrien. You have a visitor from school." Adrien's eyes widened and he hopped up and covered up the dent in his wall with his furniture. He glanced down and silently cursed himself for not changing out of his pajamas.

He barely had time to think about who it might be when Nathalie walked in with her clipboard pressed to her chest. "Your friend is here to deliver your schoolwork and work with you on the group project."

"I- okay?" He said, confused. He hadn't been told there was going to be a group project. Nathalie walked out the door and he waited, stretching to see who was with her. The door closed, and the room was silent.

Was she joking? He thought for a second. Nathalie wasn't the joking type. He waited a second more, and very quietly a girl with dark hair and pigtails turned the corner, her cheeks pink and a folder pressed tightly to her chest. She stared at her feet awkwardly as he stared, waiting for her to say something.

"I- I brought your school- um- work because you haven't been here the past few d-days and um I've been really worried I mean- everyone's been really worried." She took a step closer and tripped over her own feet, the papers in the folder scattering as she plummeted.

He jumped up and caught her before she hit the ground, his hands hoisting her up as she clutched his arms. She looked up at him and their eyes met, bright green meeting bluebell blue.

His cheeks heated and suddenly she pulled away, stumbling to collect all of the papers. He bent down to help her, and she rambled "sorry" a few times as he collected them. "So..." he said, breaking the awkward silence that followed, "what group project are we working on?"

She inhaled and dropped the folder again, papers scattering once more. He couldn't help but laugh, her embarrassment making it even funnier. She giggled along with him, and her laugh was contagious, sending him into an even further frenzy of laughter.

They laughed until their chests hurt, and laid on his floor, gasping for breath. "I haven't laughed that hard in a long time." He said, wiping his eyes. "The last time I laughed like that I..."

He trailed off as a sudden jolt of deja vu filled his body. The last time he had laughed that hard was with her. Chat Noir and Marinette, bursting into a laughing frenzy and collapsing onto her pink rug in a fit of giggles. She had been so sad that night- and he still didn't know why, but he had made her feel better, just like she was doing for him that very moment.

She turned to him and met his eyes once more, her pink cheeks highlighted by her smile. "I'm sorry," she giggled. "I can't even bring you schoolwork without tripping over myself." They sat up, not even bothering to pick up the scattered papers.

He watched her as she sit up and hastily tried to neaten the papers, a small smile tugging at her lips as she tried to help the lost cause. He couldn't help but smile at her, her focused little grin and her beautifully pink cheeks.

"Thank you for coming Marinette," he said quietly. She looked up, surprised, then smiled again. "N-no problem! Anything for the boy I love- I mean that I like! As a very good friend!" She smiled wide and finally got the papers into the folder.

They stood up and stared at each other for a second, each beat lasting an eternity, until her cheeks got so red she had to break the eye contact. He scratched the back of his neck nervously. "Soooo, um, the project?"

She looked down, her smile disappearing. "Right. The project..."

She twisted her fingers together and bit her lip anxiously, as if she couldn't find the right words. They were silent for what felt like eternities, until she eventually blurted out, "there is no project."

He tilted his head to the side, confused. "Then why-"

"Adrien, I'm worried about you," she said. "You haven't been answering any calls, and haven't been in school for weeks. Everyone says that you're probably okay and that your father probably wanted you home with the election and everything but I don't believe them. I'm scared. I miss your smile, and your laugh, and how happy you make everyone around you."

She took a deep breath and looked up, meeting his eyes with a newfound determination. "I... miss you. I know we aren't as close as you might be with soem of your other friends but... you mean so much to me. Since the day we met I..." She dragged out the words, as if they were the hardest things to say in the entire universe, and looked away again, biting her lip.

He couldn't help but notice how close they were, both of them leaning against the edge of his bed, fingers just inches away. Her shoulders brushed his as she turned to face him again, her eyes shining with something... beautiful. Is this what beautiful friendships feel like? Adrien wondered, memorizing her every detail, from her shiny dark hair, to her bright blue eyes and rosy cheeks, the way she smiled subconsciously, the way she spoke when she wasn't stuttering.

Is this really what friendship feels like?

Or is it something else entirely?

She met his eyes once more, this time locking her gaze with his, staring at him so intensely that he had to remind himself to breathe. "Adrien, when I first met you, I misjudged you. I assumed the worst, thinking that you were stuck up, and pretentious. But then I got to know you and I saw who you were deep down, someone sweet, selfless, generous, and so much more." He looked into her eyes, and realized that what she was saying was sincere. It was all coming from her heart. But it wasn't the first time he had heard it.

"There's something I've wanted to tell you for awhile, but every time I try my brain just freezes and I stutter and trip over my own feet." She took a deep breath. "This time though, I think I'm ready.'

Everything was falling into place. His heart was beating a million miles a minute, everything leading up to the three words he knew she was going to say next. He remembered it so clearly. Sitting on her balcony, his mouth open in awe as she practiced her proclamation for the last time. "This time, I think I'm ready. I love you."

"Adrien I- I lo-"

She never got to finish.