The Prodigy

The Brettfast Club

Part 2 was amazing as expected. But why did Netflix have to cancel this show?! -Mal.

I started my day fixing computers in Gigi's department. While I was preoccupied, Reagan came into the room. "Morning, Lisa." She greeted. "Have you seen Brett?" "Check the HQ." I replied. "If he's not there, he's in the sex deck." "Why the hell would he be in there?" Reagan asked. "Beats me. I just found him in there while trying to fix it for JR." I explained as Reagan glared at me. "What?! I still gave him his privacy."

Back in HQ, JR dumped out a bunch of vintage toys from the 80's. "Say hello to today's mission." JR said. "Jolt Cola? Lawn darts? Slap bracelets?" I asked. "Son of a bitch!" Glenn cursed, getting hit by a slap bracelet. "What kind of mission is this, JR?" Gigi asked. "Are we assassinating a 1980's sleepover?" Myc wondered. "Not directly." JR explained. "Still Valley, Wyoming. In 1984, we tested our first mind erasing chemicals there. Unfortunately, they worked too well. They've been mentally stuck in 1984 ever since, which makes it the perfect place for us to sell all of corporate America's recalled, outdated, and dangerous products. Ow! Goddamn, these things are sharp." "We're trapping a town in the '80s to sell them recalled crap?" Reagan asked. "That is radically unethical." "Yes. Radically unethical!" JR exclaimed. "God, my eyes are killing me. Anyhoo, every few years, we give them a fresh spritz of a chemtrail called Nostalgia Max to keep them bodaciously brain damaged. That's what you'll be doing this week. Here's the keys to the jet." "Hey, JR, how about on this mission, we all really immerse ourselves in the 1980s?" Brett suggested. "No phones, no social media, just a group of seven way best friends really connecting face to face." "I'm a teenager, no one my age can actually live without social media, but I do have an NES." I said as everyone else complained. "That's right. Nothing but DuckTales, Mario Kart, and Legends of Zelda." "Brett's got a point for the first time ever." Reagan explains. "If '80s town catches us on a modern device, it'll totally blow our cover." "Then it's settled. Get ready to have a great time in the past." JR said. "Oh shit. I should've said "blast in the past."" "Alright, everyone. Hand over your devices." Reagan said, using some of her robots to take our devices. Gigi didn't take the news so well. "Oh, no! Not my Instagram! You son of a bitch!" Gigi cursed. "I'll fucking murder you! I know where you sleep! In the walls!"

After taking off in the jet, Brett was playing around with the crap we needed to drop off. "Look at all this stuff, guys. Doesn't it just bring you back?" Brett asked. "Oh, I don't know dick about 80s pop culture." Reagan replied. "My dad threw out the TV to make me focus on science." "Weird science?" Andre asked. "Yeah." Reagan replied. "Wait, if that's a reference to something, I don't get it." "Brett, I was born in 2006." I said. "Although, I do love me a good 80s movie." "Aw, this stuff is making me nostalgic for a time in my life when acid wash wasn't just a way to get rid of a body." Gigi explains. "Come on, guys. The 80s were a garbage decade. We only idealize the past because our brains distort the memory of it." Reagan said. "Hey, there is nothing wrong with my brain..." Brett explains as he's suddenly distracted by a set of markers. "Oh my God, I had these exact scented markers! Ooh! Take me away, cosmic berry blast!" "Jesus, you remind me of Andre." I groaned. "Why do you even care about this stuff?" Gigi asked. "Weren't you born in the 90s?" "Yeah, but I always felt like a slightly older soul." Brett replied. "Also, the 80s had the best TV show ever, The Growing Years. That was my family's Sunday night ritual." "Didn't that little brother from that show become a drug addict?" Andre asked. "Yes. Yes he did, but not until the 90s." Brett explains just as Myc got out of the bathroom. "Wow, someone other than Brett got into the spirit of this mission." I joked. "Myc, how about a game of Simon?" Brett offered. "I'm not taking orders from some disco-ass hubcap." Myc refused as we heard a vibrating sound from a modern device. "Wait, Myc, did you smuggle modern day technology onto our 1980s group bonding/mass hypnosis mission?" Brett asked, looking at Myc suspiciously. "Brett, I'd lie to you, but I just don't respect you enough." Myc replied with honesty for once. "You can get in serious trouble for that." I warned. "Approaching Still Valley!" Glenn announced. "Chemtrails locked and loaded." Reagan added. "Lowering altitude, raising attitude." Glenn said. "Venting Nostalgia Max in T-minus 3." Reagan continues. "Guys, I wanna make a toast. To us! Because when we all get together, good things happen." Brett makes a toast as Myc is ejected from the jet. "It's okay! I have parachute pants!" Myc shouted as the pants flew off. "Shit! These things are fucking worthless!" "Myc!" Brett and I shouted. "Fuck, we have to go down there and get him." Reagan complained. "If he's seen, he could blow a decades long operation and cost us a fortune. Glenn, take us down outside of town." "Leave no mushroom behind." Brett added.